A Cracked Family Portrait
by Spastic Spastic
Summary: When an infant dies it is a tragedy. When it is Chase's and Cameron's child though the whole hospital feels for them. The couple try to make it through the hardship but the impact on the relationship is tremendous. Will this tear them apart? ChaseCameron
1. Chapter 1

**Title: A Cracked Family Portrait**

**Rating: K+**

**Pairing: Chase/Cameron**

**Summary: When an infant dies it is a tragedy. When it is Chase's and Cameron's child though the whole hospital feels for them. The couple try to make it through the hardship but the impact on the relationship is tremendous. Will this tear them apart?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own House.**

IIIII

_Take a seat and catch your breath._

_You're only working towards your death_

_For us the days go by oh so slow_

IIIII

The baby died four hours after birth. Being so premature, barely seven months, took it's toll. She wasn't developed enough to make it through one day.

Cameron was inconsolable. There had been many complications throughout the pregnancy, and being doctors themselves, of course she and Chase knew there was a good chance that the baby would not make it.

Instead Chase went back to his faith and prayed everyday that his baby would make it through. The Aussie would have given anything he had, anything in the world, to have his baby girl survive. He asked God to take something away - he didn't care if he lost his car, apartment, or even a limb - this was his child. Watching her die had been so painful that he cried so hard he began to feel a headache coming on. Watching the baby gasp for breath so it's undeveloped lungs would expand just one more time . . .

Cameron's eyes were glazed over as she stared up at the ceiling.

Her baby was dead.

_How can I move on? How can I do anything? My baby . . . Cecelia . . ._

Tears came to her eyes again as she thought of how she had prepared the baby room. She had bought unisex blankets in case it wasn't a girl - surprises do happen. The room was stocked with presents from family and friends. Foreman had gotten the baby a large stuffed elephant for when it was grown up enough to clutch something. Wilson bought a little piano since new sounds would be exciting to the tyke. House had given them fifty dollars and told them to start a fund for college; since undoubtedly he/she would be a little genius given it's genes.

They had decided on Cecelia for a girl and Trenton for a boy.

When Cameron had held the baby, after she had begged the nurses before they put her in the ICU, there was a magic about her. Cecelia moved around with her tiny hands grabbing at the air. Chase had grabbed a hand, lightly rubbing his thumb over her palm lovingly.

_"That's our baby girl," He had whispered._

_"She's so beautiful . . ." Cameron whispered back cradling the baby._

_"I'm sorry but we need to get her into a safer area. She's not stable enough as of yet."_

_Reluctantly Cameron gave her child back to the nurse. It was the first and last time she would ever hold her._

"Allison? Are you thirsty?" Chase asked. He grabbed her hand to show that he was still there with support.

She shook her head. Cameron knew that if she attempted to talk a gasping sob would be the only thing coming out.

"You need to eat and drink. You lost more blood than you should have during the birth," Chase informed her of the obvious. "Nothing you withhold yourself from will make things better."

"I know that," She snapped back. She was about to take her hand away but she knew the look in his eyes. Chase was suffering as much as she was. "I'm sorry. I-I'm just . . . upset."

"We both are, and it'll be that way for a while, but please don't take it out on yourself. I'll get you whatever you want. Hell, I'll drive to New York for some special kind of cheesecake for you!" Chase smiled at her hoping it would be contagious.

A small smile appeared on her lips. "You've always been a sweetheart. I don't think any other woman has been treated this good during her pregnancy."

"I do my best," He assured while patting her hand. "So what do you want?"

Cameron considered for a moment some food and said, "Can you get me a peanut butter sandwich and some lemonade? That sounds good right about now."

"Alright sweetheart," He said. He planted a delicate kiss on her forehead before getting up to leave.

Cameron tried hold the tears in until he left but as he shut the door silent sobs racked her body. She turned on her side - away from the door - and thought of all the things Cecelia never got to experience.

Her first steps. Her first word. Would she have said "Daddy" or "Mommy" first? Would she have been interested in sports or would she prefer reading books? What would have like chocolate ice cream like her mother or like raspberry like her father?

So many things she wouldn't know because her body failed to keep the baby for another month!

_I failed Cecelia._

IIIII

Chase ran into Foreman and Wilson in the cafeteria. After seeing his red eyes and his mild shaking they came to calm him down. He couldn't even get the tray down the line before he slammed it down out of frustration and rushed away. Foreman did get out of him what food to get so he concentrated on that, leaving Wilson to deal with the poor Aussie's shot nerves.

"I don't know what to do!" He said while cradling his head in his hands. He sat down at a table while his legs kept moving up and down. "She's just a wreck and I'm trying . . . I can't do a damn thing to bring her back. My baby was dying a-and I'm a doctor! I should have done something but I can't even save my own child! What kind of father am I?"

"I know this must be extremely hard for you. I am sorry about the baby but Cameron is here now," Wilson said trying to sound as comforting as possible. "Concentrate on her."

"Right. Ignore the dead baby."

"I never said ignore it but maybe if you help her, over time things will be better." Under the disbelieving glare of the Aussie he continued. "It's only been a day. The feelings are raw and nothing seems rational anymore. Give this time."

"Here," Foreman said handing his colleague the tray. "Does Cameron want visitors?"

"I appreciate the thought but I need to talk to her for a while . . . You see, I had been planning to . . . get engaged," He sighed heavily and continued so they could fully understand, "As soon as she had the baby I had been planning to ask her to marry me. We've been together almost two years. I-I thought it was time but not anymore . . ."

"Chase you can't let this tragedy become toxic to all aspects of your life," said Foreman while taking a seat beside him. "I think she would be over-joyed!"

"So do I," added Wilson.

"Let me think about it for a while. Not this early. Not yet."

He left the cafeteria with the tray. He just wished he had gotten something for him to eat but this wasn't about him right now. Cameron needed him to be her hero right now and if he had to skip a few meals, not sleep for nights at a time, he would do it.

Chase loved her. There was nothing more to do besides shower her with affection and assurance. Then again it wouldn't seem to be enough because they had both expected for that affection from their daughter.

_Everything keeps going back to Cecelia. I don't know if we'll both escape this._

He never did bring up the engagement. He could not find it within him to ask her to marry him after he had done a miserable job of saving the baby.

IIIII

Cameron hated how she was being selfish - atleast that was the way she saw it - because no matter what she thought of either herself or her child. Over the next few days she saw Chase smile against their mutual adversity as though he were fine. Of course he wasn't. It was his offspring too but Cameron still found it hard to speak sometimes. A strangled cry would come out, more than often, and Chase would hold her hand to show that he was there for her.

Everybody came to see her and Chase. Cuddy said she was setting up funeral plans so they had nothing to worry about. It would be that Sunday at 10 in the morning. Cameron would be discharged by then so they could attend it. She wasn't sure how she would re-act to seeing Cecelia in a tiny coffin when the old cliché popped into her mind. It was that the child was supposed to bury the parents, not the opposite.

House even visited. He didn't say much but said he would also go to the funeral. He did not try to put effort into cracking a joke, or even have a drip of sarcasm in his voice. What House did say was that he remembered when he and Stacy thought about having a child but decided to wait.

House did say that they should try again. After that, when Chase and Cameron's heads hung low on that note, he left.

Foreman, Wilson, and a lot of the staff also said they would go to the funeral. The pain started to evolve into a hollow spot when they heard the words _Cecelia_ and _funeral _put together in the same sentence. It seemed to become detached, somehow, as though it were another child they spoke of.

The discharge papers came to them four days after the birth and death. On a Friday. They wanted to make sure that Cameron was stable enough, and after a blood transfusion, she was declared healthy enough to go home. It seemed like a chance to have privacy but it was a curse.

Cameron, and Chase, weren't sure if they could go into the baby's room without breaking down again.

"Thank you so much for everything Cuddy," said Cameron as she got into the elevator with Chase by her side. "I appreciate it."

"Of course. And feel free to take time off to grieve properly. We do have people here you can talk to. The doors are open for either of you," She said kindly. She did try to make it obvious though that Chase should get help, if needed, too.

Chase clutched his girlfriend's hand tightly. He could feel the box containing the ring in his pocket. It seemed to become heavier every second he thought about what he should do. He thought about proposing every since she announced her pregnancy. If he were a Christian through and through he would have waited until marriage to have a baby but he figured that if you were in love there was no need for a piece of paper saying what you already know.

IIIII

Cameron passed the nursery room without stopping.

Chase had his hand on the doorknob but turned away.

The two were busy trying to distract themselves. Cameron took it easy as possible. She did cook, and dust, but mostly read on the couch. A nice novel seemed the perfect way to fade away from life.

Chase kept the house spotless. He had always been a bit of a clean freak throughout his life and with the need to escape reality he did all he could. He vacuumed the living room four times, mopped the kitchen twice, and used a whole two bottles of cleaning formula to scrub things down. He - of course - avoided the nursery.

That was how Friday passed away.

Saturday was a new day and Chase was going into his routine of cleaning once again. Cameron decided enough was enough.

"Chase, you're going to drive a hole into the kitchen counter if you scrub it one more time," Cameron said trying to sound remotely humorous.

Chase put down the rag and new bottle of cleaner. He reached out grabbing her by her arms and pulled her into a tight hug. It was sudden but welcomed.

"Do you think Cecelia would have liked the color red? I got her a red blanket because I thought it was a color liked by both genders but it reminds a lot of people of blood," Cameron said. It appeared to come out of nowhere when in fact she had thought about it constantly. "Did I make a bad choice?"

"You're reading into it too much," Chase said holding her out some so he could face her. He let his forehead rest on hers and smiled. "I'm sure she would have loved it. Like mother, like daughter. Right?"

"Yeah . . ." Tears began to gather in her eyes once again. She blinked them away before asking, "Do you want sushi for lunch?"

"No I'm not hungry."

"Remember in the hospital when you told me I should eat?" She reminded him.

"It's not the same. You weren't eating out of grief," He said. "I'm doing it because I'm actually not hungry."

"Well, okay, but you are eating dinner whether you're hungry or not," said Cameron while wiping off some dust from his shoulder. "Even if I have to shove it down your throat."

"Oooh, kinky," Chase joked.

"We can play doctor and patient later. I am actually hungry."

"So cliché. What about cop and robber?"

"What are we? Thirteen?" Cameron smiled at him as she got some fish and rice out of the refrigerator to begin rolling them up in seaweed.

The phone began to ring and Chase went to answer it. He came into the kitchen to hand the phone over saying it was her Mother.

"Hi Mom," Cameron said brightly. She had to fake that she was fine - she didn't want to worry her Mom who had a heart condition. "Tomorrow. Are you coming? Yeah, I know, wouldn't miss it . . . I love you too, Mom. Thank you . . ." Her voice begin to crack but she regained her composure to continue the conversation.

Chase let her have privacy. Meanwhile he was fighting with himself to open the door to the nursery but he couldn't.

_Do it sometime this week atleast. It can't be so painful that you can't straighten things up..._

But it _could_ be that painful.

IIIII

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	2. Chapter 2

IIIII

_But your blonde hair and gaping eyes,_

_Sent tingles down my nervous spine,_

_And now the days go by oh so slow._

IIIII

"Chase?" Cameron was forced to shake him awake since he wouldn't wake up otherwise. It was odd though, to everyone else, that she still called him 'Chase' after all of their time spent as a couple. Personally she thought that was a cuter name than Robert. "It's nine. We don't want to be late."

That was the start of a bitter and tense morning. Neither of them truly wanted to go to their child's funeral. In a sad way they wanted to forget this tragic chapter of their lives and move on to a happier time. Chase nor Cameron could bring themselves to stay home, naturally. Cecelia deserved to be remembered even if she only spent a few hours alive.

The wake happened at 10 so everyone could view the infant and touch her one last time before sending her six feet under. That was what they were most concerned about . . . How were they supposed to re-act to a cold corpse of their child? Cry and run out of the room? Scream in anger at the sky hoping God was listening to their string of curses?

After getting dressed properly, in all black, and eating breakfast they started their way to the wake at the funeral home.

Chase, who was driving, looked at his girlfriend. It looked like she hadn't gotten much sleep. Her gaze was solemn while she mourned the loss. Chase reached over for a moment to brush some stray hairs behind her ear.

"You look beautiful this morning," He said hoping it would cheer her.

Cameron said nothing. She only gave him a slight smile.

She did finally speak though. "I'm sorry that we have to go through this," Cameron muttered, sounding heartbroken. "I wish that I could have held out a bit longer but my contractions were getting worse and there was nothing I could do."

"You don't blame yourself do you?" The silence was a way of saying yes. "Allison, don't do that to yourself. I know you would have done anything to help her. I would have done anything too but it just wasn't meant to be, I guess."

"But _why_?" Cameron snapped out of frustration. "I don't get why this would happen to us! I thought I was healthy enough to have a child!"

"You are it's just that Cecelia had too many problems herself. You heard what they told us, right? She wasn't moving along properly throughout the pregnancy. Cecelia was too underdeveloped for an infant . . ." Chase remembered that her skin had been almost opaque, and she was as light as a feather, but to him she had been beautiful.

"I know that but why _her_?"

Chase shook his head at a loss for an answer.

The rest of the car ride was spent in an overwhelmingly uncomfortable silence.

IIIII

"Oh Alley!" Mrs. Cameron used her daughter's nickname while embracing her. Cameron melted into her mother's arms sobbing for the loss. "I'm so sorry, honey."

"So am I," She said softly. She turned to her father who always kept his composure no matter the situation. Except for this. His eyes were bloodshot as though he had been crying for a while. "Hi Dad."

"I already saw her," He said. "She would have grown up to be just as beautiful as her mother. I just know it."

Chase agreed. "I bet she would have had your smile."

"I hoped she would have had your eyes," Cameron replied. "But . . ."

Before she could cry more she started walking down the hall passing her child's wake. At the end of the long hallway she began to pace back and forth. It was a nervous habit she had developed throughout her pregnancy.

"Allison?" Chase called out. He stood outside the open doors of the wake, giving everyone inside an empty smile. He felt a hand on his shoulder and saw Mrs. Cameron shaking her head.

"Let her walk it off, honey," She suggested while her daughter paced trying to hold herself together. "It is nice to see you again, Robert, although I'm sorry it's under such horrible circumstances."

"Thanks for coming," Chase could only manage to speak in short sentences or he would start to break down. "I'm waiting for her."

"No, go ahead," Cameron persisted loudly from down the hall. "I'll join you in a minute, I promise."

Reluctantly Chase stepped into the room where he was greeted by familiar faces. They gave their condolences and he tried to strike up conversation with whomever approached him so he could buy time. If he went over to the open coffin he knew that his tough facade would break. He felt as though he had to remain calm as to keep being the strong man of the relationship. Cameron needed someone to lean on now more than ever and he had to be there with dry eyes.

It was times like these were Chase wished his parents were alive.

Chase wasn't paying attention to much other than out the window where he tried to count how many flowers surrounded the outside. That concentration was broken when he heard his name called by a female voice but it wasn't Cameron.

He saw Cuddy waving for him to come over to her, by the coffin, where Cameron was silently shedding tears. She said something to Cuddy and gave her a brief hug. Chase walked over and draped his arm across Cameron's shoulders. He tried to look at anything but the casket.

"She looks like a porcelain doll," Cameron commented. She reached down and stroked her cold child's face. "Do you like her dress Chase? Cuddy bought it for her."

"Yeah, it's nice," He said blankly. He focused on the serene look on the infant's face and here they were, a complete mess, but Cecelia looked as though she were soundly asleep. "Thank you."

"Of course," Cuddy said.

Cecilia wore a tiny dress that looked soft to the touch. It was a light shade of pink, with red bows aligned in a row down the middle. He hadn't seen such little dress shoes before but the frilly bonnet she wore made her look more lively. Chase imagined her as she was dressed now, rolling around in her rocker, giggling at every sound as she had new experiences, and reaching out with her little hands to hold onto her care takers. Even hearing her cry in the middle of the night, waking them both up from a deep sleep, would be a treat.

None of that would happen now. She never had a chance.

"Whoever said big boys don't cry was wrong," Cameron said as she wiped a tear away from Chase's eye.

"Oh, um-"

"I didn't expect you not to cry. It's okay," She said softly. Cameron wrapped her arm around his waist.

He immediately dabbed them away with his sleeve. Chase hadn't realized he had been shedding tears since the minute he looked to his deceased daughter. The last person who he wanted to see him being emotional was House but he was there staring down at the newborn.

House looked up to the grieving couple to meet with some odd stares. "Why are you so shocked? I said I would come."

"I know, I just didn't know you would . . ." Chase said lightly.

Cameron looked down to Cecelia. "Do you think I would have been a good mother?" The blunt question was aimed to House.

House stared down at her for a moment, trying to figure what her emotional status was at the moment, and when that was put aside he asked, "Why are you asking me?"

"I figured out of everyone here that you would tell me the truth."

Chase, from behind Cameron, gave House a protective stare. He didn't want him to insult her in this desolate time.

"Based on how I've seen you with kids, your kid would have all the security in the world," House said. "Just don't send the kid to Uncle Greg. Wilson's dog broke into my Vicodin before and was stoned for days. Imagine a kid like that. Suddenly Daddy's hair would come alive."

"I'll note that," Cameron said with a small smile.

Meanwhile Chase couldn't figure out why she would ever think she _wouldn't_ be a good mother.

"You guys probably won't come into work for a few days. I'm going to have Clinic Duty while you're gone. Don't let that weigh on your conscience too much."

"I'm coming in to work tomorrow," Cameron spoke up.

Without delay Chase asked, "Are you sure that is the right thing to do?"

"If I sit around all day it will only make this harder," Cameron said turning away from her daughter's casket. She wiped at her eyes with a tissue.

"I wanted to talk about a few things though," Chase said under his breath. "We do need to talk."

"We can do two things at once."

"I'd prefer that you two don't argue at work," House said.

"We won't argue," Cameron snapped back. She than turned to face Chase and said more calmly, "I think stopping our schedules would not help. We need to return to our normal lives or atleast as normal as it can be."

"Allison don't make a hasty decision. You're emotions are clouded from seeing her today. Just take a few days off-"

"No," Cameron cut in. "I'm going back to work Chase. I-I need a distraction. My baby is gone and I can't think about it or . . ." She broke into sobs, digging her head into his chest for comfort.

House decided to give them a private moment and went over to Wilson and Cuddy. "So do you think they'll last?" He asked them.

The two looked at eachother, then to House, as though they didn't believe he would ask that.

"Why wouldn't they?" Wilson questioned.

"I don't know. Dead babies usually stir up the worst in people, especially if it's yours," said House nonchalantly. "That's why I wanted them to stay home. Fighting it out at work will just cause more problems."

"They want to come back to work so soon?" Cuddy said skeptically.

"Cameron does. Chase doesn't. Problem number one and I'm sure this isn't the last one."

"I know that a loss of a child is devastating but they can work through it," optimistically said Wilson. "They can always have more kids."

"You might say that but Cameron, she's a small girl. I think she lost the baby because her body can't function under the stress of pregnancy."

"Oh really House," scoffed Cuddy. "That can't be the basis-"

"What did you say?"

House turned around to a wide-eyed Cameron. She repeated herself more loudly, and with more anger, "What did you say?"

"You weren't supposed to hear that," House told her sounding uneasy.

"So it's _my_ fault I lost the baby? She would have been fine if it wasn't for me?"

"You need to gain weight before you have another kid is all I'm saying."

Attention came to their conversation and Chase, who had gone to the bathroom, came into the room giving them a confused stare.

"Are you sure? I never thought . . ."

"Cameron," sympathetically said Cuddy. "It isn't your fault and there was nothing you could do to change it."

"I thought if I ate healthy and stayed fit that she'd be better," She admitted. "But it _killed_ her?"

Chase came up behind Cameron and brought her into a hug trying to shush her down a little. He glared at House who wasn't uneasy anymore - he was nervous.

"What did you say to her?" The Aussie demanded to know.

"I didn't-"

"Yes you did!" He accused. "What did you say?"

"It doesn't matter," Wilson tried to cut in. "What he said was wrong, Cameron. He didn't mean to blame you, he just-"

"You _blamed_ her?" Chase shouted. He let go of his girlfriend who immediately found comfort in her mothers arms. "How could you? It wasn't her fault that Cecelia died!"

"You bastard," Mr. Cameron snarled, getting right into House's face. "You better be glad that you're crippled or you would be lying face down on the floor right now."

"Look, _Allison_," House tried to ignore Chase and Mr. Cameron, "I meant that it could have been a possibility but I'm betting that it's mostly Cecelia who had defects."

"Because my body couldn't handle the baby," Cameron said softly.

"Alley don't say that," Mrs. Cameron ran her fingers through her daughters hair. "It's okay. Don't believe him, sweetheart. It's not true."

_I can't believe my weight was the problem. I really did fail her._

"Get out of here," Chase said as cold as ice. He was trying to remain calm for Cameron's sake. "I better not see you at the grave site either."

"Fine. I'll go. See you at work tomorrow," He muttered under his breath and made his way out with Wilson following behind him. House was all too glad to leave them alone.

"You really have to apologize better than that," Wilson told him out in the parking lot. "A possibility?"

"I lied right through my teeth," House said. "You and I both know that no one can bear a child while they're that small. I was going to tell her to gain weight but she did seem to be doing well. They should have done a C-section on her. Would have been a lot less painful. Not to mention not as messy."

"If you think about it the baby has the power. If it's coming out the way nature intended they have to let it happen," Wilson argued. "But unfortunately . . . you're right. She probably could have kept it longer if her body could have handled it."

"I guess this could be seen as a lesson learned the hard way."

"You didn't have to put it so bluntly."

"Someone had to tell her."

"But you were saying it behind her back," reminded Wilson.

"I think work is going to be fun tomorrow. Don't you?"

"I'm going to see her be buried," Wilson said as House got onto his motorcycle. "Do you want me to apologize for you?"

"I have nothing to apologize for," House said. "The truth hurts sometimes. She'll get over it. You did say that she could always have more kids."

Wilson scoffed, "Too bad she can't get a new boss."

"Touché'."

IIIII _After The Burial _IIIII

"Let's stop at McDonalds to get something to eat," Cameron suggested.

Chase looked at her from the corner of his eye. She was serious.

"You know that I don't like that place. It's ruining a lot of healthy people's lives."

"I never said that you had to get anything," She said coldly. "All I want is a cheeseburger and some fries. I'm not going to get anything extravagant. I just don't feel like cooking tonight."

"Understandable but I can cook. I'll make you something healthy," Chase insisted. "How about tofu burgers?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"So what if I want McDonalds? Why do you care?"

"Because it is dripping with grease and calories," Chase more heatedly than intended. "I am not going to let my girlfriend ruin her body with fattening foods."

"Here we go again with the obesity. I am not going to gain two hundred pounds overnight, Chase," She said. "And for your information most people who are 'fat' can be perfectly healthy at the same time."

"No they can't. They drop dead at forty from a heart attack! You never see an obese old person because they don't exist!"

"You are being unbelievably ridiculous," Cameron said. She was beginning to becoming very fervent about this subject since it came up a lot with Chase around. "You're just being prejudice. You don't want your girlfriend to become fat, right? If I gained twenty pounds, even if it meant we could have a healthy child, you would leave me?"

"So that's what this is all about. All of that bull House said," Chase said as he turned into a gas station. He pulled up to a pump so he could begin fueling his car. He had hoped that would be the end of the conversation but Cameron got out, slammed the car door, and went over to him.

"House was right," She tried to keep her voice from breaking. "If I had just been a little heavier my body could have handle the stress. With the weight I am at right now, one hundred pounds, I can't do it."

"What he said was inane," He debated. "He was just being a jerk like he always is. We should have never let him come in the first place."

"Do you know why I asked him about me being a good mother?"

"I don't know. Could it be that you're overwhelmingly insecure on that subject?"

"No. It's because I knew he would tell me the truth," Cameron said. "Unlike you."

Chase put the gas pump back in it's holder. "I'm going inside to pay for the gas. Do you want anything?"

"Yeah. Hershey's chocolate and some pizza."

"Allison," He said sternly. "I am not going to let you do this to yourself."

Cameron looked defeated as she read the look in his eyes. He was being dead serious with her, wasn't he? Chase really believed that if she ate something attached with being obese, or anything from a fast food restaurant, that she would gain too much weight.

"House isn't half the ass that you can be sometimes," She seethed and slammed her door shut as she got into the passenger seat.

_Don't yell. Stay calm. She's just in a delicate condition. She's upset over Cecelia. She's upset because of House. Irrational decisions come about when someone is emotionally exhausted . . ._ Chase thought. It was hard to stay calm though when Cameron was seemingly making wrong decisions about her body. Especially when it was House's doing.

_I have to get him to apologize and say that he was wrong tomorrow or we'll never resolve this._

When they arrived home Cameron ate as much as she wanted, and Chase let her, as long as he could control what she was eating.

IIIII

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**Chapters should be weekly - every Monday.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I want to assure all of you reading that Chase's behavior WILL be explained in later chapters. Everyone has their sensitive subjects and his eating/obese persons.**

IIIII

_I am yours if you want it_

_I could be yours to spend your life with_

_We'll hide indoors, petrified of the world_

IIIII

Chase felt rather guilty about how he had treated Cameron the night before. He knew that he should have been more sensitive to her sudden concern of her weight. Of course when he thought logically he knew that a couple cheeseburgers every once and a while would not hurt her. Cameron was perfect the way she was so he saw no problem. Maybe she could stand to gain some weight, for the sake of being able to carry a child, because problems like those could help in the demise of a child.

Not for one second though did he believe that it was the main cause.

He could tell that what House had said was weighing on her mind the whole night. She was tossing in turning in bed and seemed to be having a nightmare. At one point he woke her up because she was swatting at an invisible enemy and hit him instead.

"Allison, it's okay," He said softly. She didn't open her eyes but seemed to relax at the sound of his voice. She still whimpered something that sound like the words 'don't hurt'. "Shhh... nobody's going to hurt you. I'm here."

The next morning Cameron hadn't remembered anything. Not the nightmare and not the comforting Chase provided in the middle of the night.

At seven in the morning Cameron got out of bed, leaving her boyfriend to a better sleep, and made herself scrambled eggs, toast, and a large glass of milk. She made more than she knew she could eat but she had to gain weight. It had been on her mind ever since last night. Chase didn't stop her from ravaging the cupboards for anything she might find appetizing.

Cameron ended up eating three peaches, a handful of grapes, two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and for desert a caramel covered apple.

_I won't screw up this time. I will have a kid the healthy way. If that means gaining a little weight I will deal with it._

_And Chase will have to deal with it too,_ She thought as she began to eat.

Twenty minutes later Chase got up to see Cameron pouring herself another glass of milk. "Good morning," He said. "Can you get me a glass of that?"

"Sure."

The morning went on without much conversation. Cameron wanted to say that she was going to gain some weight and then they can try to have a kid again but somehow the quiet in the apartment was nice.

Chase knew what was on her mind but for him also he enjoyed the peace.

There was no way to avoid the conversation but both of them did not feel emotionally stable enough to handle it. They were exhausted from the prior day's conversations so, unknown to them, they were silently agreeing to a truce; Atleast for now.

IIIII

"Eight year old male. Presents with a fever, hives on his feet, and with a slightly elevated blood count. Ideas?" said House.

"Malaria would be most likely," said Foreman.

"The doctors before already said it was negative," House said.

"We should try to rule out schistosomiasis," Foreman suggested after a silence.

"Good try but I don't think he's been swimming in Vietnam lately."

"Didn't you read the file?"

"Is this a rhetorical question?"

"He's adopted from Vietnam," Foreman reminded.

"While this is all good and interesting I'd rather have more ideas. Particularly from a certain Dr. Chase and Dr. Cameron," House looked to the couple who jumped to life when he called their names. "Welcome back to reality."

After a short glance at the patient's folder Cameron spoke up. "We should check what he's been eating. Raw food is a festering place for types of worms."

"I need a type of worm, not types. Narrow them down," said House. "Go check for schistosomiasis and ask the kid what food he's been eating in his hometown. Make a list so I can make sure I steer clear of it."

The three got up and went out but House called Cameron to come back for a minute. She did so and put on her best poker fast she could muster.

"Are you going to apologize for yesterday?" She questioned bluntly.

"I wanted to tell you that while what I said is a possibility, I don't think your baby was healthy itself. There were too many things wrong with her to tell any definite cause. Her lungs were underdeveloped, her skin was as thin as paper, and her heart was weak at best . . . it wasn't all you.

"Let me re-phrase myself. I think you should gain some weight. It'd be healthier for you and the baby just so your body doesn't go under the same stress it did prior."

Cameron nodded. She bit her lower lip and said, "I guess . . . I have to start all over again."

"You should," House said sounding genuine. "Don't let one mistake ruin your life."

"Sounds hypocritical coming from you but alright."

"Go eat yourself into a double chin and some love handles," He insisted and went into his office.

IIIII

At lunch Chase figured it would be a better time than any to ask about Cameron's short conversation with House. He certainly couldn't have said anything awful - Cameron seemed to be functioning just fine - but he couldn't imagine an apology come out of that man's mouth either.

Cameron sat down at a table with two man sandwiches saying, "I'm going to see a nutritionally oriented physician tomorrow."

"Why?"

"Your argument, while sounding over-the-top, had some truth in it," she admitted. "If I'm going to become pregnant again I want to do it the right way, which isn't stuffing my face with food."

Chase smiled. "I'm glad."

"Oh, and I want to think of a new girl name."

"Cecelia was a beautiful name."

She nodded and tapped Chase's wandering hand away from her sandwich. "It was buried with Cecelia, of course, so we need to think of another one."

"I'll think about it but I want to know what House said to your earlier," Chase jumped to the question weighing heavily on his mind. "An apology?"

"Yeah, right. The end of human civilization isn't that close yet," answered Cameron. She tore her food in half and gave one of the halves to Chase since he found his burger as satisfying as cardboard. "He clarified on what he meant . . . he said we should try again after I get my body thicker."

"You're just small is all. You say it like a bad thing," He huffed.

"I want to cover all of the bases this time," Cameron said, determined. "I can't handle another loss . . ."

Chase reached over and held her hand gently in his to comfort her.

"Just imagine a little piece of us running around, hm?" A smile appeared on her face at the thought. "You get diaper duty though."

"Than you get to potty train him," She shot back. "Or her."

"I hope it's a girl," Chase said wistfully.

"Why?"

"Boys are a pain to raise. My parents would have agreed," Chase said with a laugh. "I used to draw on the wall with crayons. Like any other three year old, I couldn't reach the faucet, so I thought peeing on the drawings would wash it away just as good. I left it there 'cause it stunk and I didn't want to clean it up. I blamed it on the dog."

"Did it work?"

"It would have worked better if we had a dog," He mused. "First thing off the top of my head though."

Cameron laughed for a moment and then asked suddenly, as it popped into her head, "What was your mother's name?"

"Um, Janice. Any particular reason you need to know?"

"I think it would a great name to give our daughter," She said hoping it would come off as a compliment. Chase never told her much about his mother, since his mother died when he was a teenager. Cameron thought it could be an homage to her, of sorts.

Chase's smile immediately turned into a grimace. "You want to name her after an alcoholic?"

"I thought it would be nice to pay tribute to her is all. She was your mother, even if-"

"I'm sorry Allison. I'm still frustrated at the mention of her is all," He bitterly explained. "Maybe we can think of another name. I know she's my Mom but if we do have a daughter she will not be associated with a drunk."

"I wasn't trying to be demeaning-"

"I know, I know," He said hastily. "Just drop it okay?"

Cameron retreated and decided to talk about the nutritional doctor. _I guess he's kind of touchy today_, she thought.

IIIII

Cameron was in the lab checking the newest tox screens and wasn't expecting any visitors. It just so happened that Wilson came in.

"Hey Cameron," He said.

"Hi," She smiled back to him. After he didn't make any moves towards the table she asked, "Did you need to run some labs?"

"No," Wilson shook his head.

"Consult?"

"Not that either," He shot that down too.

"Did House send you to tell me something?" She kept guessing.

"I'm worried about you, is all," Wilson admitted. "I know what House said yesterday was out of line-"

"It wasn't."

"Right. So you were crying because you were happy?"

"He just said it the wrong way. He made things clear this morning so everyone can stop worrying about me."

Wilson tried to look her in the eye but she kept looking away. "I wanted to make sure you were doing okay besides that too."

"Cecelia is gone . . . I can deal with that in time. It hurts a lot still but there will be a time when it won't hurt so much," Cameron said trying hold back any tears. "And a time when I'll tell my next child about his or her's older sister."

"That's the spirit," Wilson said. "Now if only your eyes didn't say the opposite."

"Wilson why are you even here?" She said exasperated. "We're not even that close."

"Yeah, I know, that's the tragic part. Thing is it's hard to get as close as I would like to with someone who isn't single."

Cameron paused for a moment to look at Wilson who also paused as he realized he had 'diarrhea of the mouth'. "Are you saying that you . . ."

Words were lost on Wilson as he tried to find the right things to say so he could back-track without making things worse.

She smiled. "You're attracted to me?"

"That's not what I wanted to say. I just wanted to make sure you're okay. I'm not sure why that came out . . . just forget it."

"Thank you," Cameron said before he could make a quick exit due to a fair amount of embarrassment. "And just so you know, if I wasn't with Chase, I would date you."

Wilson gave a quick nod and headed out. _I really should learn when to keep quiet. I could have just said that she was a good friend and I wanted to make sure she was alright but noooo . . ._

His thinking process was interrupted by House who chimed, "Went to check on the little princess to save her from the big, bad dragon? Or are you trying to play knight and hope she'll shine your sword for you?"

Wilson scoffed at his metaphor. "You're insane."

"I saw how you exited out of there," House said as he followed his favorite oncologist. "You're embarrassed. Head hung low, cheeks a light tint of red, and you're looking rather nervous. One could say you spilled the proverbial beans."

"Don't you have a soap to watch?"

"I think you, Chase, and Cameron are enough entertainment for now," He said. "But you've made me very curious. So you did say something to her and I don't think it was just a 'friend' type of thing."

As they stopped at House's office, the diagnostician added, "You know you can't escape this so get it over with. Tell me what is going on but can I get popcorn first?"

"Can we atleast do this in your office? I'm not about to let anyone else hear," Wilson said as he went into the office. "Just to make this clear, I'm in the middle of a divorce so I'm not looking for a relationship."

"Oh and you would go for her if you weren't legally married? I thought the whole 'she has a boyfriend' thing would be a turn-off but you are into affairs, now aren't you?"

"Oh shutup," Wilson said and decided to admit his attraction under the ever-accusing glare of his friend. "Of course I'm intrigued by Cameron. She's smart, obviously gorgeous, and she's nice, even to you! Chase is damn lucky to have her after you turned her down because you're obviously crazy. If she ever becomes single again-"

House cut his finger across his throat to signal for him to stop talking.

"What?"

House whistled innocently, replying, "I told you that my soaps aren't as interesting as this."

"Um . . ." He turned around to face Chase and Foreman, who had a surprised expression on his face. Chase had one of disbelief.

"Well just so you know she _won't_ be single again," Chase snapped coldly.

"Chase just hear me out-"

"I think I heard all I needed to come to the conclusion that Allison doesn't need to be alone with you," He cut in becoming more frustrated by the second. "Did you hit on her already or do you need to clearance from her _boyfriend_ first?"

"Not as of late," House jumped in. "Jimmy here is sticking to abstinence! Right?"

"I'm sorry you heard that Chase. It's not what it seemed. Yes, Cameron is attractive, but I think it doesn't need to be said that I would never hit on her. She's happy with you."

"Why even say anything when you know she's going out with me? Or do you always discuss her with House like this?" He retorted.

"Chase, calm down. You're going to say something you'll regret," Foreman said seeing where this could lead to. His words fell on deaf ears though.

"What? You think that in her moment of vulnerability that she'll cave in and sleep with you?"

"No! That's not it at all!" Wilson finally raised his voice to get the Aussie's attention. "I'm not like that. I wouldn't barge into your relationship looking for a one night stand. It wouldn't be worth it."

"Does she know about this?" Chase asked him.

"Yeah. I kind of said it, in a roundabout way, and she didn't really say anything about it but made it obvious she was with you."

"Obviously because you two aren't making out in the janitor's closet right now," House jibed.

Wilson gave him a stern glare wishing that he hadn't let himself be dragged to House's office in the first place. He should have known that Chase would be somewhere nearby and hear them talking.

"Of course she's with me. She'd be out of her mind going out with someone who's been divorced three times and slept with a dying patient!" He shouted, hoping to offend and embarrass Wilson, but the other man tried to keep his cool.

Wilson knew that Chase was using this situation to vent some much-needed ill feelings he probably kept inside for Cameron's sake. That made it much easier to take, since he knew Chase truly didn't mean it, but that didn't make his insults okay.

"Don't blow this out of proportion. I am not going to take her away. Not even close."

"Good," Chase said sharply. "And we're not going to separate so don't get your hopes up."

"You're jumping to conclusions about this, Chase. Maybe you're looking for someone to yell at because you're upset about Cecelia's death, and I understand that, but this isn't the time to do it."

Chase bit back his tongue, cursed under his breath, than marched out before he really did do something he would regret. The truth is always a bitter pill to swallow.

As he left Wilson let out a mile long sigh. He pinched the bridge of his nose as he felt a headache coming on. "Um, Foreman, sorry you had to hear that."

"Yeah . . . don't worry though. I won't say anything," He said with a nod.

Wilson made his exit and House rolled his eyes. "I guess it's time for a commercial so you can talk. Hurry up though, I don't want to miss the next scene."

IIIII

"Chase, please calm down," said Cameron. She and Chase - who was currently between frustration and misery - were in the outside eating area that was empty due to it being seven at night. "You're over-reacting to this. So what if he likes me? It doesn't matter."

"I'm sorry. I know you would never cheat on me-"

"Of course I wouldn't!" She said disgusted that he would even bring it up. "You're just feeling vulnerable. So am I. We're both devastated but I'm not going to crawl into another man's arms looking for something different. I want to be with _you_, Chase."

"Would you date him?" Chase asked suddenly.

Cameron refused to answer that. "Why does this matter so much to you?"

After hearing the tone in her voice he knew she was demanding an answer. "I . . . don't know. I don't want competition, I guess."

"You don't have competition Chase," She said with a groan of aggravation. "I'm not going to leave you for anyone."

"I'm sorry, Allison," Chase said finally letting himself relax. "I've been hard on everyone."

"You have but it's because you're frustrated. We understand, to a point. Wilson didn't deserve to be yelled at," she said, trying to sound supportive.

"Right. I should apologize to Wilson . . . it's not his fault that he's attracted to you. Hell, I'm surprised that every guy isn't pining for you at this point."

Cameron chuckled. "The same could be said for you. The nurses are all jealous that I got to you first." She gave him a gentle kiss on the lips.

"Can you promise me something though?" Chase asked.

"What is it?"

"If you ever think we need time apart you'll tell me?"

"I can promise you that will never come to fruition."

Chase let her lean on his chest and play with the collar of his shirt. "You don't think we need a break, right?" She asked although she was hesitant to do so.

"Of course not. I'm not stupid enough to leave one of the best things in my life."

"You're so cheesy," She laughed pulling away to look him in the eyes.

Chase's humor returned and he laughed with her.

Still a brittle part inside of Chase said that she could leave him. After loosing a child, how could she look at him and smile? Was there something inside her that hated him for not saving Cecelia?

Why would she stay with someone who couldn't save their child?

The man was supposed to be the hero of the family. A strong, unbreakable figure in the home that could protect his household. Chase was no hero. Atleast not in his own eyes. Maybe Cameron thought that too but she was too much of a kind person to say it to him.

IIIII

**Came out of nowhere, right? That's what I was shooting for. NOW REVIEW.**

**And NO this will not turn into a Cameron/Wilson fic. This is **_**Cameron/Chase**_** all the way but I never said there wouldn't be some threats to their relationship other than Cecelia's death . . .**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I deticate this chapter in the loving memory of Buddy. RIP 8-11-07. A caring, happy cat who loved the outdoors and eating grass. He lived a great twelve years under our roof and he will always be remembered.**

IIIII

_And if you'd rather stay in at night_

_I can relate to that_

_And if it feels like your heart's dried up_

_I can relate to that_

IIIII

After work the next day Cameron and Chase went to see Dr. Maccon, a nutritionally oriented physician, who had his own Clinic not far from the Princeton Plainsborough hospital. They were supposed to see him at 5:15 but had to wait an extra fifteen minutes for no apparent reason. The nurse said that the doctor had some other issues to take care of. Chase was a little ticked but Cameron assured him that Dr. Maccon was good.

"Allison Cameron?" someone called from the hallway's entrance.

Cameron stood up simultaneously with Chase. They both were led to room 4 and said it would be a minute or two before he came in there. The nurse asked them basic questions, took her blood pressure, and left.

"From what I can tell he likes to keep people waiting," Chase said as the nurse shut the door.

"House is exactly the same but he's good too."

"Right. He's a joy too," He said rolling his eyes. "How could you ever date him?"

"He is not a bad guy," She argued. "He's . . . just anti-social. I think he's not as tough as he thinks he is."

"But Wilson was right. House was crazy to pass you up."

"You make me sound like some grand prize."

"That make me the grand prize winner, right?" He joked, making her smile. "It's always great to be a winner."

Then Dr. Maccon, they presumed, came in. He was an older man, balding as naturally as men his age tend to do, but seemed to be too thin for his own good. Chase silently mused on how Cameron was coming to a guy as small as a toothpick for weight gain. It was ironic.

"Now you've had problems with your pregnancy, right?" He asked taking a seat in the chair and rolled over to the couple.

"Um, yes. I lost her. Pre-term baby. She didn't survive . . ."

"Sorry to hear. Pretty name though, Cecelia," Dr. Maccon complimented. "Now I should first point out that from his history Mr. Chase has a lower sperm count than most. Significant enough to mention, that is."

"Wait, what?" Chase said. This was the first that he heard of that.

"It would account for how you didn't concieve although you tried for a couple of months before becoming pregnant," The older man explained.

"This is new to me. I've never heard of this, honestly," Chase said directing that last remark to Cameron.

"I had you both examined where you work today. These tests often come back quickly and I thought it would be worth mentioning," He said. "I wanted to tell you that Mr. Chase because you can make sure to avoid hot tubs or hot baths - it reduces sperm production."

"Alright," He sighed resigning to trusting the fellow doctor. "Anything else I can do?"

"You could have injections of testosterone. It will raise the sperm count."

"How many would you recommend?"

"Two at a minimum."

"What did my tests show? Anything abnormal?" Cameron had to ask before she burst.

"No."

"Oh thank goodness," She said clutching her chest. "I was worried that I had something wrong with my ovaries."

"They're fine. It's your weight that concerns me, to be honest," Dr. Maccon told her. Cameron froze where she sat feeling as though she didn't breathe until he spoke again. "A hundred pounds is much too small. Your body would be over-working itself to support you and the fetus. I'm sorry but you will have to gain atleast eight to twelve pounds before trying to concieve again."

"Oh . . . oh, um, okay," She nodded becoming more tense about the subject. What made her worry the most was how Chase looked disappointed at the news. "Is there anything else?"

"Yes. Do you drink a lot of caffeine?"

"Coffee is about it. I drink a lot of water."

"Do not drink coffee, Mrs. Cameron," He warned. "The fetus can't detoxify caffeine since it's liver isn't able to produce the required enzymes. One and ½ cups of coffee doubles the chances of a miscarriage in the first three months of pregnancy."

It was odd, both Cameron and Chase thought, that even being doctors themselves that they never knew that.

"Are you sure? I've never even heard of that before," Chase seemed to disagree.

"I am sure, Mr. Chase," Mr. Moccan assured as though he's been asked this many times before. He looked at Cameron once again. "If you want I can give you a liquid, Viltex, which will help while trying to concieve."

She nodded. "I'll take it. Anything to help."

"Alright. Injections and Viltex . . ." He scribbled two dates for Chase's double injections. "Once a month. You can come in on Friday for the first, if it fits your schedule."

"Thanks," Chase seemed to be disappointed in himself, which he was, but he pushed his self-doubt aside.

"Oh, and if you can, avoid as much contact with chemical solutions and pesticides as you can," Dr. Moccan advised to Cameron.

Cameron nodded - no more cleaning sounded fine with her - thanked him, then bought a bottle of Viltex. There was no shame in needing some extra help although she had more than a hunch Chase didn't share that feeling.

"Well I guess we'll have to wait until I gain some more weight to try again," Cameron thought out loud.

"I can't believe I need shots of testosterone," Chase said with irritation. "I'm a guy. I shouldn't need that."

"You're a smart doctor, Chase. You know that sometimes I body doesn't cooperate how we want it to," Cameron debated with him. "It doesn't mean you're emasculated."

"Just don't tell anyone. I would never live it down," He sighed. Chase could just hear the comments House would come up with . . .

Cameron grasped his hand as they walked to the car. Before he could get in she said, "I think we should go out to eat tonight. Just to get some things off of our minds."

"Sounds good. Where to?"

"Meru's cafe. They have a deck that sits out next to the beach. It's really beautiful and very romantic . . . that way it'll get me in the mood for, you know . . ." She let her suggestion trail off into a more lecherous area.

Chase played dumb. "What? To play scrabble all night long?"

Cameron playfully hit his chest laughing with him. "What a bad boy you are Robert Chase. Scrabble can get so dirty."

"When it's been collecting dust as long as it has, yeah, sure," Chase agreed as they got into the car.

"Do you think we can take our meal and eat it right on the shore?" Cameron questioned.

Chase considered it than shrugged. "If they don't let us we can do it anyway."

He smiled as Cameron looked more content than she had in a while.

IIIII

Over the next few weeks Cameron gained some weight - six pounds. It wasn't noticeable but it was close to the 8-12 pound mark that had been set. Gaining it wasn't turning out to be very easy. Chase still insisted that she eat non-fatty foods but sometimes she snuck in the rare greasy cheeseburger or a small chocolate cake when he wasn't paying attention. Cameron felt that she had a right to put into her body whatever she wanted even if he didn't approve of it wholly.

Chase had taken his injections as scheduled and was eager to begin the 'fun' part of the process. He was even more anxious to become a father. He always swore he would be a better parent than his own turned out to be. Of course he was nervous about making wrong choices, or how his and Cameron's positions as doctors would leave the child somewhat lonely, but he was confident that he could do it. Besides the kid would not be so lonely if they decided to have another baby!

On the two-month anniversary of Cecelia's death they visited her small grave. Cameron spoke to the tombstone saying how they were going to try anew, but that Cecelia would always remain in their thoughts. Chase didn't say anything - it felt too odd to talk to a grave - but he did leave a dozen of fresh roses on the sepulcher.

IIIII

Cameron wasn't going to give up this easily. Over the next month every pregnancy test came out negative.

"That just means we get to do more 'midnight exercises'," Chase joked.

Cameron smiled weakly. "Um, Chase, when I do get pregnant will you find me attractive still? I know you don't like overweight people . . ."

"I think you should look up paranoia in the dictionary," Chase said. When that did not calm the worry in her eyes he added, "That means that _of course _I will find you attractive."

Chase reprimanded himself for telling a flat-out lie. His dislike of fat people - whether it was a bulge in the stomach or being morbidly obese - likely wasn't going to change. Although he loved Cameron he knew that when she would be in the later terms of the pregnancy, with a large belly, he wouldn't be able to look at her the same way.

In the last pregnancy she hadn't gotten much bigger - that had been their first sign of worry that things could be going wrong. He of course hoped this time would be different, but for the sake of her beauty, Chase shallowly hoped she could remain small.

It was soon after, when he was eating breakfast on the couch, he heard a scream come from the bathroom. Chase jumped up but realized that it was a horrified scream - but one from excitement.

"I'm pregnant! Oh my God!" Cameron came running out of the bathroom holding the pregnancy test. She dropped it on the floor and threw herself at Chase, giving him a tight hug, while repeating, "We're going to have a baby Chase! It worked! I'm pregnant!"

Somehow, although Chase was overjoyed by the news, he thought about how her stomach would expand. How much would she look like a regular fat woman? Would Cameron be able to keep the weight off afterwards.

While Cameron made phone calls to tell the news, Chase stood not too far away, staring at her stomach with discomfort.

IIIII

"How about Sarah?"

"To common."

"Crystal?"

"Eh, sort of stripper-ish."

"Alright," Cameron flipped through the baby book of names until she came to a random page. "Lia?"

"Too short."

"Oh now you're just being stubborn," She huffed.

"We don't even know if it's a girl yet. We'll think of one when you're further along so we can confirm it's gender," Chase explained sounding bored. Then he asked about something that needed more concern, "Have you thought about baptizing the baby?"

Cameron was about to reject the concept but knew that Chase was religious enough to deem the rejection very offensive. Although she was an Atheist and didn't like the idea . . . but relationships were about compromise.

"If it makes you happy . . ." She left the sentence unfinished hoping Chase would say something.

"I'm going to bed. Are you coming with me?" Chase asked with a seductive tone daring her to follow. Chase wanted to have sex as much as possible before her stomach began to grow.

IIIII

Cameron was beginning to worry deeply about Chase. Somehow he was drifting away, emotionally. As the pregnancy continued he spent less time with her. He worked longer shifts in the NICU even when there wasn't a shortage of nurses. He said that he wanted practice concerning babies but it was a hollow answer. Cameron could see through it.

Her hormones were getting the best of her. They say that the first trimester is when the emotions would get the best of you. She cried when she came home alone and she yelled in the empty home at a picture of Chase for not being there when she was. Cameron had even burst into tears in the hallway at work. Some nurses asked what was wrong but she didn't want to talk to anyone about it. As far as she was concerned her hormones were messing with her mind - Chases loved her. He always would. He told her that so many times . . . so why was he acting weird?

Cameron looked miserable and felt even more miserable when Chase went out by himself to the bar. Of course she wouldn't drink alcohol. It wouldn't be good for the baby. Chase knew that she wouldn't go; was that why he was going?

_You're being paranoid,_ Cameron thought. _He wants to spend time out by himself before he has to be home with a baby, just like he said._

After so many nights alone, with only some chocolate to comfort her, she decided to demand he tell her why he was avoiding her. Was it her newly bulging stomach? Was he really that shallow?

He had made her promise that if she didn't want to be with him, she would say so. Shouldn't that apply to Chase also?

Chase didn't come home that night to the cuddling of Cameron in the bed. She was camped out on the couch up waiting for him.

"It's really late Allison. You shouldn't be up," Chase said with concern.

"I was waiting for you," She said. "One in the morning. I thought that you would be back earlier, honestly."

"I'm not drunk if that's what you're concerned about," He flatly informed. When looking at her through the dark he saw she was upset. "Are you okay?"

"Why don't you stay home anymore?" Cameron questioned softly. She scooted over inviting him to sit next to her but he stayed where he stood.

"I just need some time by myself is all," He answered hoping that would calm her. "Just a couple of drinks is all I had. Really."

"I'm not worried about that. I want you to stay home more often Chase."

"We work all day together."

Cameron started to quietly weep. She walked over to Chase and wiped at her eyes with her sleeve. There was a minute of intense silence before she spoke.

"Do you still love me?"

"Of course I love you," said Chase. He was telling the truth. Just because she wasn't physically attractive with her new changing body didn't mean he no longer loved her.

"I need reassurance," Cameron spoke gently. She didn't want him to think that there was anger within her, there wasn't, but she was upset about his absence. "I want us to spend more time together. Just us. Sorry but work doesn't count, atleast not to me."

Chase smirked. He lifted her head by her chin so she could look up into his peaceful eyes. "Alright. You win. Tomorrow I'll cook and serve dinner for you. Is it a deal?" He kissed her on the forehead to seal the deal. As expected Cameron resigned, letting herself fall onto Chase's warm chest.

"I love you Chase," She whispered.

"Love you too." And he mean it.

IIIII

Cameron, at four months pregnant, was showing more than in her previous pregnancy. She saw this as a good sign - so did Chase - but he wondered if she could break away from her habit of over-eating. Now that she would be big no matter what she figured she could eat whatever she wished. Chase was just glad that while it wasn't attractive being fat from pregnancy, it was acceptable atleast. Otherwise...

"I made spaghetti with mushrooms, meatballs, and shredded cheese just the way you like it," Chase announced placing Cameron's plate in front of her. He sat down with his own plate and they began to eat.

"I'm so happy you did this," Cameron said. "I was starting to feel lonely."

"Some nurses told me about you crying . . ." Chase said with guilt etched into his face. "Was that about me?"

"It could partly be me," Cameron admitted to her uncontrollable emotions, even with the slightest things she would explode into tears. "My hormones are going nuts and I'm starting to get those weird cravings. Have you ever had chocolate ice cream with hot peppers?"

Chase laughed. "Can't say I have. How was it?"

"Fantastic," she said with a sigh.

After a couple minutes of silence, filled with them eating and drinking, Chase said, sounding determined, "I'll try to be home more often."

"I'm sure the NICU will be okay. Unless some infant is crying because you aren't there because than I'd feel guilty," answered Cameron than finished off what was on her plate.

For a moment Chase feared that she would ask for more. He had purposefully given her more than he normal would have in the hopes she wouldn't ask for more, thus eating in excess. Even if she was eating for two Cameron could pack away enough food for him, her, and a couple other people. When she didn't ask he finished his and said he could finish the dishes.

Chase knew that it was very unfair to criticize her at all but ever since he was a teenager he had problems with the overeaters, fat persons, and the morbidly obese. He knew where those hateful feelings came from it was just hard to think back to the painful past.

Chase logically knew he had to made an exception for Cameron. This was the woman he would give his life for. He could look past this . . .

His feelings weren't listening though.

IIIII

**A/N: I know that Chase really detests fat people so I don't think I'm exaggerating his dislike. It's just put him in a position where he has to question if it's really a prejudice he's always had or if it came from somewhere deeper in his past.**


	5. Chapter 5

IIIII

_And if you need someone at your side_

_I am out there_

IIIII

Cameron wasn't sure who to go to so she could let out all of what she was holding in. Chase was staying home more often but he was distant. He acted as though she were a good friend - not a lover. He refused to make love, saying he was either too tired or not in the mood, and while he would hold her he seemed uncomfortable. Chase was behaving oddly and Cameron hoped this was only a faze. Maybe he needed time.

Cameron didn't have time though. She was crying more often - whether it was from stress or hormones she wasn't sure. All she knew is that she needed to spill her guts to someone.

House? Never. Foreman? He wouldn't understand. Cuddy? She was most likely too busy to go into a full-length discussion of personal matters. And right now Cameron's mother and father were out of the states, attending a funeral of an old family friend in Ireland.

There was one more person she trusted but if Chase knew he could use it as an excuse to avoid her more than now. Wilson obviously cared, more than a friend, but Cameron was to a point where she needed someone to show her compassion. She was tired of being rejected by Chase day in and day out. When he kept her at arm's length she couldn't help but dwell on how Cecelia being alive would make all of the difference in the world. Cameron's world could be easily mended with Cecelia's smile but that day would never come.

_But she's gone . . . I'll never get to hear her speak. Or say I love you Mom . . ._ she thought rubbing at her bulging belly for comfort that another would be coming soon. Then she had a small revelation. _Is this pregnancy bringing out new angry emotions that the last didn't work?_

She needed someone to tell her it was okay so she went to see Wilson on his break.

IIIII

Wilson was hardly expecting Cameron to walk through the doors. Ever since his little slip so many months back they mutually avoided eachother unless it were medically relevant chats.

"Um, hi," she said looking timid for once. She took a seat in front of his desk. "How are you doing?"

"Well enough, given that one of my patients threw a glass at my head," He said turning his face to the left, showing a small bruise forming beside his right eye.

"Oh wow. I guess he didn't take it the news too well . . ."

"Oh no. He's going to be fine, we caught the cancer early," Wilson explained. "He has multiple personalities. Apparently Terrance, the one that threw the glass cup, doesn't like me so much."

Cameron wasn't sure what to say so she looked around a bit. His office was a bit of a mess, with papers everywhere, but otherwise it was plain. Things were in boxes piled on top of another.

"I know it's bare right now but that's because I'm moving some things around. One of my cabinets broke," Wilson said noticing her familiar glances around the room. "I was thinking of having some strobe lights installed. Maybe a disco ball."

Cameron smiled sweetly but was still unsure of what to say. She said the first thing that came to mind, "Do you think I could talk to you for a bit? I know we're both busy but I don't have anywhere else to go."

"I suspected that there had to be something really wrong for you to come to me," Wilson admitted sincerely. "Chase doesn't know? I thought you two would be attached at the hips."

"If that's the case he must have ripped hiself from me because he's being too distant with me. It know he cares for me. That has never been an issue. He does love me but . . . when he does stay home it's like we're roommates, not boyfriend and girlfriend. He doesn't hug me as much, kiss me as much, um . . ." She stopped herself before she divulged anything very personal to Wilson. "I think you get the idea."

Wilson considered what she said than asked, "Have you talk to him about this?"

"I've tried but I keep saying that it must be my hormones. Sometimes I think I'm imagining all this," She mused sadly. "But you know that he has a problem with fat people."

"So I've heard," acknowledged Wilson than it clicked. "You think he's resenting you because you're bigger now?"

Cameron nodded. "I know it sounds awful but I know he still loves me. He's not so distant that I can't tell if he cares or not. He does."

"You realize you keep going back and forth, right?"

"Come again?"

"First you say something that shows him in a bad light but then you back-track to protect him."

The immunologist ran a nervous hand through her hair. "I guess I don't want him to seem like he's a jerk because he's not."

"I know he's not too but that doesn't mean he's without faults," Wilson corrected. "I think you're problem is you worry too much about other people. I've seen you be kind to patients, and listen to their problems, because you want to help. I'm not saying it's a bad quality, empathy and sympathy are rare nowadays, but you can't fix everybody. Chase has problems and you can't mend them for him. That's why you're frustrated.

"Reminds me of my date with House. He said I liked damaged people and that's why I married my last husband," She recalled.

"Fixing everyone is a hard job especially when you're pregnant," Wilson said. "Chase may not be as damaged as House but you're straining to try and repair him. Having him stay home more often could just be putting fuel on the fire. You need to have him get some help. From what I've heard from House, Chase's childhood wasn't great just because he was rich."

"I don't even know much about when he was younger. I guess there's something he could be hiding that's causing him to act so weird . . . I just can't think of what."

"Maybe he had an obese family member who wasn't the greatest of people. Maybe his parents could have been health-nuts and forced him to do exercises, or limited his eating, just so he could stay fit," Wilson suggested.

Cameron nodded thinking about how it was strong possibility. She knew little about Chase's childhood, and that was most likely because there was something dark in there . . . something that he was letting stir slowly inside causing him to act this way.

"I'm not sure how to make him attracted to me," Cameron said with immense insecurity. "Sometimes I think I'm not . . . pretty anymore."

"Cameron, don't let this ruin your self-image. It's not unheard of men becoming cold when their wives are pregnant. Chase is just in that stage right now. You have to ride it out," Wilson said hoping that this was getting through to her. He hated to see someone he cared for to be so downhearted.

"What about you?" She asked curiously. "Do you find pregnant woman attractive? And don't say you do if you don't mean it."

"Actually, yes. I think a woman can be heavy and sexy," Wilson answered sincerely.

"Do you . . . still think I'm . . . ?" Cameron couldn't finish her sentence because she began to feel as though she were stringing him along.

The oncologist opened his mouth to answer, considered something, than shut his mouth. When Cameron worried he was going to reject her he finally answered, "Yes I do. You're still as beautiful as ever. I waited so long because I wanted to make sure that Chase wasn't within a hearing distance."

Cameron smiled getting out of the chair after getting the assurance she needed. "Thank you Wilson."

"Cameron I-"

"Call me Allison," she said before shutting the door behind her.

Wilson shook his head not so sure if it was a good thing if they kept talking to one another. He was never that good at controlling his sexual conduct . . . and the last thing he wanted to was to have a weak moment and do something both he and Cameron would be likely to regret.

He doubted Cameron would make a move on him. Wilson remembered the story of her husband, falling for his best friend, and while she had an emotional affair she never acted on her feelings.

_Atleast she has self-control_, Wilson thought.

IIIII

"She obviously wants you."

"No. She wouldn't cheat on Chase."

"You'd like her to thought," House said jabbing his friend on his leg with his cane. "You want her to slip."

"You aren't helping," seethed Wilson. He sunk down in his seat quietly eating his meal he had cooked in the morning - which looked disgusting - but was most likely heaven on a plate.

"Have I ever led you to believe I would participate in this 'helping' you speak of?"

"Yes. Such a fool I am," Wilson scoffed. "Just don't send her to me if you need a consult. I know how you work. You'd do that just to mess with my head."

House raised a suspicious eyebrow. "How do you jump from 'Hey does this on the X-Ray look suspicious' to sex in the office? Just curious because I'd take advantage of that situation if I need to get laid."

"Thanks for sharing."

"So . . . do you want me to send you Chase instead?" He inquired to trying to sound innocent. "Or will that lead to sex too?"

"Can you take anything seriously?" Wilson knew that was a far-out concept.

"Is anyone dying?"

"You wouldn't care even if someone was dying," Wilson pointed out. "Now all I ask of you is not to send her. For any reason."

"Fine. Foreman it is. But you know what they say . . ." House smirked. "Once you go black you never go back."

Wilson decided to get smart with him and said thoughtfully, "So _that's_ why you keep him around."

"Go find Cameron and insert piece A into slot B, if you know what I mean. You're not fun anymore," House snapped, snapping a rubberband Wilson's way but narrowly missed.

IIIII

"Can I feel your tummy?"

Penny, their current patient, asked as Foreman was readying her for a lumbar puncture. She was only eight and had never gotten too close to feel a pregnant woman's stomach.

Cameron was sitting at the head of the bed trying to keep her calm. The child's parents were currently out on some business. "Of course," she said. She let Penny touch her stomach and she seemed in awe.

"Does it hurt having a baby inside you?"

"I'm about to do it Penny. Can you stay still for me?" Foreman asked taking the needle out of it's sterile cap. After a nod he directed her to take a deep breath and not to move at all.

Penny tried her hardest not to cry but ended up weeping. Cameron started comforting the child with promises of sweets afterwards. She could see the pain starting to fade away in the girl's big blue orbs.

Cameron smiled thinking about her own child to come. She couldn't wait to have a beautiful child of her own. There were so many people waiting on her - Her parents, Wilson, Foreman, Cuddy, House, the entire nursing staff, and most importantly Chase . . . although he seemed more stressed and irritable than her.

Why though?

IIIII

"Are you staying home tonight?" asked Cameron curtly as they were leaving the hospital together.

"I need to go relieve some stress," He snapped heatedly.

"And I need you at home," she said with the same fierceness.

"If I go out for a few hours you'll be okay, won't you?" He questioned. Chase sounded concerned for a moment.

"I'm willing to compromise," Cameron replied coolly. She vainly hoped her calm attitude would be contagious but Chase didn't budge from his emotional stance of irritation.

He stopped outside the drivers door looking over the car to Cameron. "I need to relieve some stress, Allison," He repeated but more miffed.

"And you think I don't?" She retorted.

Chase was going to snap back but held his tongue. He knew that he would say something he would regret very much if he spoke his mind. Wordlessly, he got into the car and started it. After getting in Cameron tried to hold his hand but he refused to.

"Chase! What is wrong with you?" Cameron cried out.

"Allison, please, just drop-"

"You never talk to me anymore. It always seems like you're somewhere else mentally," She cut in. "You never hold me anymore either. I'm carrying your child, Chase, and you don't seem to care."

"Of course I care! Don't ever imply that I don't!" He snapped back severely. "I will _always _care for that child."

Cameron whispered, although she feared to ask, "What about me?"

"Allison . . ." Chase said sympathetically. He unstrapped his seat belt and reached out to give her a kiss but it was her this time refusing contact. "What?"

"Kiss me when you mean it," She said sounding more composed. "You're only kissing me now out of pity. I'm not that pathetic to let you do that so I'll feel comforted for the time being. I'd rather wait until you're ready. You need to deal with whatever problems are making you so . . ." Cameron paused searching for a fit word, ". . . apathetic."

"I'm trying to figure what those problems are," Chase admitted slowly. "I do know that I'd give anything to have Cecelia right now. Kids always cheer me up."

"Do you still want to go out?"

Chase started pulling out of the hospital parking lot. He didn't utter a word until they were on the road.

"I want to, yeah, but I shouldn't. So . . . I won't."

"Am I that repulsive that you want to still leave?" She asked adamantly.

"You are _not_ repulsive. Do not ever think that! I love you, I do! You are a beautiful, intelligent, kind woman who I am lucky to have," Chase said. He wanted to get that across first of all even if he had to repeat it a hundred times. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have yelled but I don't like fat people for a reason. I know you're pregnant, it's not your fault, and all that. I just can't see past your stomach. I'm sorry."

Cameron probed not-so-subtly, "I would really like to know why. I always have. You've always been so passionate that I knew it was beyond plain prejudice."

"I'm not in a good mood so maybe we can discuss it some other time?" Chase suggested hoping to dodge the bullet.

"I need to know," Cameron said with demand. "I want to know what could make you so angry that you could look at me and be unable to see _me_ anymore."

"Wait until we get home atleast."

Cameron decided to settle for atleast that much. Except when they arrived home it seemed to be forgotten. Chase vacuumed almost every room - a sign he was very nervous, since cleaning calmed his nerves - and mopped the bathroom. Cameron made dinner, they ate, and Chase immediately went back to cleaning.

He still avoided the nursery.

IIIII

Chase was finally done at 9:00 - two hours straight of scrubbing, dusting, vacuuming, and washing. He went to the kitchen to get a quick glass of grape juice before settling on the couch with Cameron. He figured that he should try to get close to her, despite his personal discomfort, because she was still the same bright personality that he came to know and love.

She wasn't there though. Chase was going to sit down and wait for her but something told him to look elsewhere. He walked to the hall to have a look and noticed that the nursery door was opened a couple inches.

When he approached the room he expected to hear sobbing. When she ventured in there she always left a few minutes later, wiping at her wet eyes, trying to hold back the pain of overwhelming loss.

"Cameron?" He whispered. He did so because on one occasion she fell asleep in the rocking chair next to the crib.

This time she was at the bulletin board placing various pictures up with tacks. There were a few of her and Chase, one of Cameron's parents, and double's of Cecelia's first and last pictures. The originals were framed on their nightstand in their room.

"Do you need more pictures? I can go find more photo albums," Chase offered coming up beside her to look at the pictures.

"No. I want to save some room for our newborns pictures. I can't wait!" She smiled pleasingly.

"Or we could buy a bigger bulletin board."

"Do you want to put a picture of your parents up here?" hesitantly asked Cameron. She expected a somber expression to come on his face, which normally happened when they were mentioned, but he shook his head. "I know you aren't happy with them but I think it would be important to have all the grandparents up there."

Cameron had placed it above the crib so when the baby looked up he/she would see his/her parents and grandparents.

Chase said nothing. He dug into his pockets, pulled out his wallet, and started looking through all of the compartments. For what Cameron wasn't sure. Maybe he decided it would be alright to put a picture of his parents up there? Probably not. Chase seemed bent on tearing himself away from Rowan's image and hardly ever spoke of his mother. She must have been a horrible alcoholic to leave Chase so full of fury.

He took out a wallet-sized picture and handed it to Cameron so she could study it. It was a woman, looking around 35, and she had a brilliant smile and bright blue eyes. She was a small woman with flowing brunette hair waving behind her back. She was sitting on a log holding a cigarette in one hand and a hot dog in the other. Chase was sitting next to her - he looked about 12 or so - with a grin on his face.

"That's my Aunt Lillian, on my mother's side. She used to take me camping all of the time when Mom and Dad were too busy to bother with me," Chase explained. "She was the ultimate Aunt - caring, would spoil me, and became what I needed most - a stable, consistent adult."

"You've never mentioned her before," commented Cameron after handing the picture back.

"That's because I don't talk to her now," Chase said simply. "She's in a half-way home. She's so damn fat she can't even take care of herself.."

Clemency burst inside of Cameron. "What? How?"

Ignoring that he said, "I hold onto the good memories because when things went bad, they really went bad."

Cameron frowned in confusion. "Can you tell me or . . . ?"

"She didn't always look this way," He waved the picture a bit. "As her mind deteriorated so did her body. Lillian let herself go, eating in vast amounts, and sometimes puking in the bathroom to make room for more. I'm not sure what hole she was trying to fill. Maybe the one my Mom made. She used to be a nice 140 but jumped up to 300.

"She was taking care of me since Mom was always plastered. After Dad left, Mom fell apart. Lillian was great for a year but I realized that she was crumbling inside. As she got larger her attitude started to change. Suddenly she didn't care about me anymore. I was a nuisance, a brat. She told me often to stay in my room when I got home from school so she didn't see me.

"I guess She couldn't handle watching her only sister die slowly through alcohol poisoning," Chase said, cold, as though he were trying to disconnect himself from the events. "I didn't want to be alone. So when she had an emotional breakdown I begged her to stay."

Cameron knew that he was telling her the reason for his resentment. She reached out to hold his hands in hers to let him know that she was listening.

"I don't know why I asked her to stay even. I hated her by the time she wanted to leave. I guess I didn't want to loose what little parentage I had left. When I did ask Lillian went into a rage," Chase recalled. "She was so big I couldn't stop her. Lillian used her massive weight against me. She sat on me and started to beat me. I was defenseless against all of that weight . . ."

Sensing the strain in his voice she said, "Chase you don't-"

"You wanted to hear it so you are going to hear it," He reminded than went on. "She did stay but made my life a living hell. My Mom was too drunk to pay attention so Lillian did as she pleased. She'd give me rotten food for dinner than lock the refrigerator and hide the key. More than once she sent me to school with clothes she poured spoiled milk on to embarrass me. It worked it's job too. Lillian would lock me in my room and sit outside of the door, reciting poetry she wrote about me, most about some pretty sick things, I won't even go into that . . . but I could tell that if I didn't get out soon that she would be capable of worse things than just beating me."

"Chase, I'm sorry I asked," Cameron said becoming more emotional as he talked of his abuse at the hands of his once loving Aunt. "I understand now. Really."

"I think I should finish because I need you to get the whole picture," Chase pushed forward to continue his story. "It didn't last that long. Two months was her reign of terror because my Mom died from alcohol poisoning. Lillian was declared unstable after I told the cops about her insanity. She admitted to everything but never apologized for it. She did say I deserved it. The last thing I remember was her arguing with the cops to use three sets of handcuffs because she was too fat for just one."

Cameron asked, "Why do you still have her picture?"

Considering that question he stood there for a minute looking at the thin face of who his Aunt used to be. He remembered when that picture was taken - it was his first camping trip that didn't include his parents. Chase had been so happy that he hadn't thought about running through the woods at such a fast past, out of pure excitement, then fate decided to be cruel and he received a stray branch to the face. Lillian had giggled, and at first he was embarrassed, but when she cleaned out the small cut with peroxide, telling him funny jokes so he wouldn't feel the sting, and put on a Band-Aid was he knew that he would always love her.

"I miss who she was is all. I guess I can understand her psychosis - after dealing with Mom for so long I thought I'd shoot someone," He said with a humorless smile. Chase sounded bitter but held back the worst of it. "Just that now, whenever I see someone big I think of her. I hate what she did to me."

"You're not going to put her on the board, right?" Cameron asked.

"I shouldn't," was all he said and put it back into his wallet.

"You shouldn't have that picture either," She said with tenacity. "She's the reason why you spew hate about obese people. They don't deserve it, Chase, and I don't either."

"I've never spewed hate to you," He said solemnly.

"I can tell you want to. It's in your eyes," argued Cameron. "You want to see me but you see Lillian. Everytime someone overweight comes along she comes back to haunt you, right?"

"Unfortunately."

"I'm sorry," Cameron said digging her head into his chest. She hugged him not caring that Chase fidgeted under the touch of her belly. "I'm sorry you were hurt."

"It's in the past. I only brought it up for you to understand that it's not you, it's her. It's me."

With a serious look in her eyes she stared up into his searching for something. She wasn't sure what he was feeling. Chase was a master at controlling his emotions except when it came to some form of frustration. Cameron could see that there was pain still festering as he thought of all the things he went through during those two months of constant hardship and humiliation.

_No wonder he's distant. If I remind him of Lillian, even if it's only my weight, I can't blame him_, Cameron thought wishing she could take back all of her hasty judgment. Out of loneliness she had sought the worst of circumstances to keep her company when Chase didn't need persecution - he needed understanding.

Something popped into her head and she asked, "Do you want to get some couple's counseling?"

"Allison, no," Chase immediately denied. "We don't need counselors. We're fine."

"Oh? And I suppose these last few months haven't taught you that we're in trouble?"

"I'll admit that we might need help with Cecelia . . ."

"Anyone who was abused needs help."

"Were you abused?"

"No but that's not-"

"Than we don't need _couple's_ counseling," He said and added more calmly, "But don't worry about me. I'm doing fine. I've put the past behind me."

"Except you see Lillian in every fat person you see, yeah, that's not a problem," Cameron said sarcastically.

"Maybe I'm not over it but it's been years. I'll feel like a moron bringing up things from over ten years ago."

"There are adults who have been abused thirty years ago and still seek help!" Cameron debated with him.

Chase let out a sigh. "Look, counseling works for some people. Not me. Can we just go to bed already? It's almost ten."

Cameron thought for a moment he was going to kiss her but instead he turned away. She was disappointed of course but maybe he could work through this on his own.

_I doubt it,_ Cameron began to dispute with herself in her mind. _But I'll keep a close eye on him just in case. He may think he doesn't need support but. . . ._

When they crawled into bed Cameron felt arms wrap around her expanded waistline - Chase's. He let his body press up against hers and laid delicate kisses on her neck.

"I love you," He said.

"I love you too." Cameron rolled over to meet with his lips, feeling the passion that had been gone long ago, and she felt at peace once again.

IIIII

**A/N: **

**I hope that you review! It'll only take a moment to give me reassurance! Anyway . . .**

**So now you know. I know he doesn't like obese people, and she is obviously not going to turn obese, but he doesn't like fat in any sense. And let me tell you some pregnant ladies get BIG.**

**Lillian ruined it for all of the full-figured ladies out there.**


	6. Chapter 6

IIIII

_In the grass at Union Square_

_I touched your face, pushed back your hair_

_And said, "The days go by oh so slow."_

IIIII

Chase woke up the next morning and was gazing in awe at Cameron's angelic features as she slept. He couldn't believe that he had refused her in these last few months. He had let Lillian damage more of his life than she already had. With renewed vigor he told himself that he wouldn't allow his Aunt to take anymore of his life away from him.

_Cameron deserves better than that_, he thought as he made his way to the shower.

He came out to the welcomed scent of bacon and eggs frying in the kitchen. Chase went in there, gave her a good morning kiss, and sat down at the kitchen table to wait for her.

"Do you want to think of new girl names?" Chase asked.

Cameron gave him a confused stare. "I thought you said you didn't want to until you were sure of the gender."

"I think we should pick a new boy name too," He suggested as he took a plate of sizzling bacon and scrambled eggs from his sweetheart. "Thanks, Alley."

Cameron sat down to eat and said, "I thought you really liked the name Trenton. You did pick it out, after all."

"I thought it would be better to pick new names. You know, since we're starting over."

"Well . . . I have always liked the boy name Brandon."

"That's a good name too. I was thinking about Daniel or Ash."

"Ash is cute," Cameron agreed with a smile. "Short for Ashton. Yeah. That's a really good one. We should stick with it."

Chase nodded in agreement. He was glad that this baby-naming process was taking shorter time than the last pregnancy - it took them atleast three months to agree on Cecelia and Trenton. "What about a girl?"

After a moment Cameron put forth the name, "Isabella."

Chase took immediate liking to it. "I just hope that our girl is girly enough for that name. Imagine a tomboy named Isabella."

"I don't think so," Cameron chuckled.

Ashton and Isabella were the new names and the parents never felt better about them. Cecelia would never be forgotten but these were new times that would hopefully sink the dreadfull memories of the past to their subconscious.

IIIII

At her sixth month of pregnancy it was still unclear what the gender of the baby was. They were disappointed but excited about the idea of a surprise. Chase joked about a hermaphrodite baby, so they could choose which sex it was, but Cameron only rolled her eyes.

During that time Cameron noticed Wilson's avoidance of her. She understood that he didn't want the tension that would tend to come around whenever they were around eachother. The fact that they were attracted to one another should have been a signal for Cameron to stay away but she enjoyed Wilson's friendship. House had made remarks about being a teasing minx and that she couldn't use Jewish foreplay - the one of four hours of begging- on Wilson, of Jewish religion, since she wasn't Jewish, but she shrugged them off. Atleast House didn't say it in front of Chase.

Cameron decided that she shouldn't chance it either. Things were going good with Chase and if he was having a bad day, then saw them together, he might dream up something about her cheating on him. It was odd to think of it that way, she should be able to have any friend she wanted to, but for the sake of Chase she would try to stay away.

"Our patient's out of surgery," said Cameron, opening House's door to inform him.

"I'll tell him when he gets here. He ran out when I told him Cuddy was looking for him," Wilson explained the other doctor's absence. "Hi Allison."

"Does this mean I can call you James?" She asked coming into the room with a smile.

"Why not?" He agreed uneasily.

Although she had promised herself not to talk in length with Wilson she broke that vow. "Alright, James, I'd like to know why you've been evading me with your best efforts."

Deciding that the truth would atleast get them somewhere he admitted, "I don't want us to . . . make a mistake."

"I would never cheat on Chase," Cameron said firmly. She stood next to Wilson, looking him in the eyes. "You should know that."

"But as for emotions, well those little buggers don't have boundaries."

"I agree," said Cameron. She held out her hand for a shake. "Can we agree to a truce?"

"What kind of truce?"

"To remaining good friends. I don't want to ruin a good friendship over some feelings of attraction, no matter how strong or weak they are," Cameron insisted the handshake after bringing it forth once again but closer to his own hand. "Agreed?"

Wilson shook her hand. "Have you worked things out with Chase?"

"Things are doing fine now. I haven't gotten the chance to thank you."

"For what?"

"When I was stressed and needed someone to talk to, you were there," She reminded him. "And I did find out what was wrong with Chase. He's coming back to me bit by bit."

"That's good to hear," Wilson said sincerely.

"Did you hear about the new names?"

"Ashton and Isabella. I heard them through House," He said. "Cute names too."

"Thanks."

"You two better not be having sex on my desk!" reprimanded House coming into his office with Cuddy trailing behind him. "If you are going to atleast clean up after yourself. And if any Vicodin pills go missing during your relations I demand permission to do cavity searches."

"House, shutup," groaned Wilson while shaking his head.

"He shouldn't be wasting his words here. He has another clinic patient to take care of," Cuddy informed the other two in the room.

"I refuse to look at another infected scrotum as long as I live, woman! What part don't you get?" House said as though it were an oath he swore to obey. "Have Cameron do it."

Cameron gave him a bitter smirk. "Thanks so much but I'll have to pass that up."

"We have a patient to take care of anyway," House said waving a file at Cuddy. "Thirty two year old male with temporary psychosis, vomiting, migraines, and fever. Remember him? Had him since yesterday and I don't think he's doing so hot."

"I'm sure your team can handle it. Now go back to exam room 3 before I _bring_ the infected scrotum to _you_," Cuddy said as a threat than marched out, silently reminding herself to buy a stress ball or four on her way from work.

"She's just warming up so she can go do her night job as a dominatrix," House said to his one employee and friend. "Where's Goldilocks and the Dark One?"

"Checking the urine for toxins. He refused to pee in a cup before today and has been drinking large amounts of water, so we're sure he has something in him," Cameron informed him of their whereabouts. "I think you should go back to the exam room, House. I don't think Cuddy was joking about bringing him back to you."

"What made you think that?" asked House sarcastically. He turned to Wilson, "I'll give you twenty bucks to go do it for me."

"Fifty."

"Thirty."

"Fifty or it's no deal."

"Fine," House dug out a fifty from his wallet and handed it to Wilson. "Now go have fun. Don't rush yourself. I hear the guy is bisexual so he might like you."

As soon as Wilson was gone House set his sights on Cameron. "So? You two have any fun yet or are you still with Chase?"

Cameron scoffed at the idea. "I'm not going to do it House. I refuse to be your soap opera for the day."

"But pregnant women are supposed to cause drama," argued the diagnostician as he popped a Vicodin. "Atleast that's what all the comics of today are saying."

"I'm going to go see the patient to get a more extensive family history. He was out of control yesterday with his psychotic episodes but with some sedatives in his system he should be alright to answer questions."

"Go ahead. Just watch out. Wilson might try to drag you into the janitor's closet."

Again, Cameron ignored him knowing he was only trying to push her buttons, and left to check on the patient.

IIIII

When she arrived at his room she saw that Chase and Foreman must have already left. Cameron was the only one besides Oscar in the room. The shades were closed in the window and the shades covering glass panels looking into the patient's room were also drawn, since Oscar had several migraines. She checked his vitals, since he was asleep.

"Oscar? Are you awake?" Cameron asked softly trying to stir him from his sleep. "I need to ask you about your family."

"Go away," He groaned rolling to face away his doctor.

"We need to find out what is wrong with you. Maybe there's something in your history that could help us figure this out. How is your mother's health?"

"I said leave me alone," Oscar repeated many times as Cameron tried in vain to coax him into telling her information. "You're not my mother. You can't tell me what to do lady. And you better tell the doctors to give me more morphine."

"Are you in pain?"

"If I have to break my arm to get morphine, I will," threatened Oscar with all sincerity. He rolled over to face Cameron with his bloodshot eyes. "I want some morphine."

Cameron let out a sigh. "I need you to tell me-"

"I need some more morphine! What's wrong with you, huh? Letting me suffer?"

"We know you're a drug-addict, Oscar. We've been giving you Vicodin, which should take care of it, but I don't believe your migraines are as bad as you say. I don't even know what nurse who gave you morphine this morning was thinking. I'm sorry she confused you," Cameron sternly voiced.

"I don't care what you nurses think! I need morphine!" Oscar snarled. It was as though he were trying to intimidate her since he was two times her size, even with her large stomach.

"I already told you, unless you're in pain-"

"You want me to be in pain?" He snapped angrily.

"I didn't say that."

"I don't listen to some pregnant whore. Who's the father, huh? Some one-night stand in a bathroom stall?" Oscar taunted in a harsh whisper. "Or are you some incestuous freak?"

Cameron remained calm, trying not to let his ugly words get to her. "If you don't want to answer my questions, fine, but if you would feel more comfortable talking to another male I could let one of my colleague's talk to you."

"I want to talk to your boyfriend so I can ask if he's in a sharing mood. Ha ha!" He laughed in her face. After calming himself down he added, "I'm sorry. Don't look angry little girl."

Looking stiff from containing her frustration, Cameron said, "If you want to talk to someone later tell a nurse."

As she turned on her heel Oscar grabbed her forearm to keep her back. He swung his legs over the bed and tried to put on a smile. "Wait, wait, wait. I'll talk."

Cameron took in a deep breath telling herself that she would always get patients that weren't raised to respect others. She tried to pull out of his grasp but it only resulted in a tighter grip.

"Let go."

"What? Don't like it rough?"

"If you don't I will be forced to yell for nurses to restrain you."

"I may not be a handy man, but that can be easily fixed," He chirped all too kindly.

Before Cameron could re-act there was a hand over her mouth, pulling her onto his lap where she squirmed to get away, while his other hand gently massaged her stomach. She squeezed her eyes shut hoping that someone would come in to check on them. Cameron considered biting his hand to get away but he sent chills down her spine when he finally decided to speak.

"If you don't do what I say to do, little girl, I swear to God I'll punch you right in your gut. It'd be a shame to lose the baby after all of these months, hmmm?"

That threat struck the very tender nerve in Cameron that nearly brought tears to her eyes just contemplating loosing another child. Any pregnant woman would fear about having a miscarriage, or a complication, but since she had already lost her precious Cecelia, the menace of that happening again . . . Then again, surely she couldn't sit there and take whatever he was going to do.

_Why is this happening? Ugh, I think I'm going to puke._

"Stop squirming. You're going to make my IV rip out of my hand," hissed Oscar. When his hand squeezed her stomach she stopped cold. "Atleast I know how to control you now. What, did you lose a kid? Do you have a baby rotting in the ground somewhere?"

_I need to get out of this before he decides to do more than just taunt me._

Cameron was sneaking a hand to the emergency call button placed on the side of the bed to get some nurses in here. Oscar noticed and moved his hand from her mouth to the front of her throat, clutching in just enough to hurt but not to block her airway, and she shivered with his hot breath rolling down her quivering neck. Cameron brought her hands up to claw at his hand but he didn't release his vice grip.

"I told you not to do anything," He said dully. He tapped her stomach a few times to get across that he was serious about his earlier threat. "I'll hit harder next time."

"What do you want?" Cameron croaked from the strain on her neck. "I'll get you morphine if that's what you're after."

"No! I think you need to be taught a lesson, little girl, that you are no better than me just because you went to college. You think you're better than anyone else you damn-"

"Look, Oscar, you don't want to do this. If you assault me in any way I will go to the police-"

"Shutup, rat fink!" He shook her violently and threw her to the floor. Cameron made sure to leave her hands out letting them take most of the weight, but her stomach was too far out not to hit and quake from the crash. She rolled over to find Oscar ripping off his clothes, and tearing his IV out, with a sick smile on his face. "I'll teach you doctors to mess with my head!"

Cameron quickly moved and hit the emergency button, and she could hear the beeping at the front desk down the hall. She screamed as Oscar jumped on her, trying to rip open her blouse, smacking her in the face several times trying to get Cameron to cooperate. She tried to cover her stomach but in his frenzy he had forgotten all about her pregnant belly. He leaned on it for support making her worry about the pressure. She barely even registered that he had opened her shirt and was trying to massage her breasts.

Oscar kept trying to kiss her but she clawed at him while trying to wiggle from underneath his weight. Cameron was sure that he would end up with a few good scratches from her nails.

"Help! Nurse!" Cameron yelled when three nurses came running into the room. It seemed as though she had waited forever for them to come. They pulled at Oscar who still had hold on her shirt. It tore giving the nurses more freedom to hold him down for a sedative, without worrying about Cameron getting hurt in the process.

Cameron backed up to the wall, not caring that more were coming into the room to make sure that she was alright, and opened up her blouse all of the way to check if her stomach had any sign of bruising. Thankfully it was left without blotches but as for her face and upper chest she was covered with yellow, blue, and red blemishes.

"Allison! Oh my God!" Chase said coming to her side, pushing all the worried nurses Cameron hadn't responded to, and her head snapped up. "What did he do to you?"

"I-I . . . he said he would hurt the baby if I didn't do as he said!" She blurted out. Although no tears ran down her face, her eyes gleamed as she looked back at her boyfriend. "I knew I couldn't just sit here and take it so I hit the button but-" Cameron shook her head burying it into Chase's welcoming arms. "That wasn't a psychotic episode! He really wanted to hurt me!"

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone with a patient with temporary psychosis. What was I thinking?" Chase muttered to himself as he ran his fingers through her hair. "Sweetheart, do you want to run home and get a change of clothes? You're blouse is torn."

"Huh?" She withdrew from his embrace and turned red as she saw that it was. She covered herself with her arms, luckily before House, Foreman, and Wilson came into the room. Cuddy came in soon afterwards to make sure that Cameron wasn't seriously injured.

"He didn't hit you in the stomach did he?" Cuddy asked with sympathy. She handed Cameron her doctor's coat that had been thrown off during the brawl.

Everyone breathed a sign of relief when she shook her head. "He leaned on me and I thought the pressure would hurt the baby but I think the baby will be okay."

"I'm so sorry," Cuddy apologized. "Do you want me to call the police for you?"

"Do you believe this, in your medical opinion, was a temporary psychosis?" House butted in. When Cameron shook her head he said to Cuddy, "Than the police should be called. Duh."

Cameron closed her doctor's coat tightly around her. She looked to the bed where the nurses were laying Oscar out once again. He was passed out now from the sedative but she looked away quickly before another chill ran down her spine.

"Did he . . . get very far?" Foreman asked the hard question that was on everyone's minds.

"No!" Cameron snapped as though offended he insinuated that. After seeing how they could interpret that as denial she let herself cool off before replying again. "No, he didn't. All he did was open my shirt and lay his grimy hands all over me-" Another shiver came over her "-but I'll be okay. I-I just need some fresh air."

Finally tears made their way down her face but Chase wiped them away for her. "You'll get some fresh air. We're going home for a while," Chase said to the others as he led her out of the room, softly saying that Oscar wouldn't get a chance to hurt her again.

Cameron, for the next few hours, was the talk of the hospital. She was embarrassed about the attack but refused to stay home. Her theory was that she would dwell to much on what could have happened or if the baby had suffered trauma. Chase was practically glued to her side and that was understandable. The police had been called but due to medical reasons he wouldn't be able to be put behind bars until he was diagnosed. Foreman - even if he was resistant to even care for Oscar after he attacked his colleague - felt he should so he could get out of the there before he hurt someone else.

Chase observed how Cameron tried to brush it off as though it were nothing. He was worried that Oscar had gotten further than she would admit. One half of him wanted to beat the information out of Oscar than beat him some more for daring to lay a hand on his girlfriend. Than the other half wished that he would have been there to stop it from the beginning. After all, Oscar had psychotic episodes, but he hadn't dreamed that he would take it out on Cameron in such a way.

It was hard letting it all sink in when everything had been running smoothly. Chase had been happy, Cameron had been happy, then in the likeliest of all places it fell apart in a hospital.

Cameron did Clinic Duty until it closed and Chase brought dinner to her. The two wouldn't eat alone though. Wilson and House tagged along. Wilson wanted to make sure that Cameron was going to be okay while House simply followed his friend, hoping to snatch some free food from him.

"I appreciate all of your worries but really, I'll be okay," She said as Wilson queried about how she was doing. "I just have a few bruises. That can be easily covered with makeup."

"Do you think you should get an ultra sound to see if the baby is okay?" Wilson asked. When he saw her saddened reaction he added, "I'm not trying to worry you. I just think it would be best to make sure. Better safe than sorry."

"I suppose," Cameron said as she poked at her slice of cheesecake mindlessly. "I really hope . . ." She stopped herself before tears could make their way down her cheeks.

Chase wrapped his arm around her shoulders knowing what she was going to say. His heart sunk when he had been told that Cameron was attacked by their patient. Oscar was taller and weighed over 200 pounds but Chase would have given anything to be there and to stop him; even if he had gotten hurt horribly in the process.

It was another time he had failed both Cameron and his child.

He pushed down the guilt he felt though so he could comfort Cameron. Chase would gladly hide his own angst just to see his girlfriend have that golden smile on her face.

"But everything will be okay," Cameron said with determination. "I just can't wait for the baby to come. I'll get one of those carriers that you strap on and carry him around."

"Yes, I'm sure he'll just love all of the disease's and urine smells of the hospital," House sarcastically mused. "Maybe even poke someone with a needle or two or mess around with people during Clinic Duty."

Cameron smirked. "That sounds like your kid, not mine."

"House with children?" Wilson repeated. "Sounds like some fantasy world where black with white, up is down-"

"And all oncologists have been wiped out," House finished his sentence for him.

Chase was barely there during the conversation. Cameron, Wilson, and House seemed to be going on with trading sarcastic remarks but he couldn't stop thinking of how with one swift move their baby could have been seriously injured or even dead. He wouldn't had even known about it. He had been trying to help save that bastard's life and he was attacking Cameron!

_This is so frustrating. I need some air._

He excused himself saying he was going to the bathroom but he went out to the hospital parking lot wondering how he would do as a father. It was horrible the sorts of things that could set him off. Oscar hadn't even hurt him and he was more upset than Cameron was.

_Stay cool. If Cameron's okay . . . than everything will be alright._

There was still a dark pit in the bottom of his stomach tormenting him.

_You couldn't save Cecelia and you couldn't help Cameron this time. What makes you think you can even think of marriage right now?_

He clutched the small black box containing a gold ring with Cameron's name inscribed on it that he had for a while now. It was in his pocket where he figured he could bring it out when the time seemed right. Although that time had never come it was hard to see when it would ever come to fulfillment, especially when he had so many self-defeating thoughts multiplying inside of his head.

IIIII

**Poor Chase and Cameron. I can't help but torment them.**

**Reviews please? I need so much reassurance it's ridiculous.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Rating has gone up for a not PG love scene.**

IIIII

_And we've learned that life is one big game_

_Where the winners are all getting paid_

_So stop dragging your feet behind_

IIIII

As the days passed Chase could feel his insecurities begin to rise and fall with every couple of hours. For one moment he would feel as though he could take care of Cameron and their child but in the next he dreaded having to worry about another human of which he was responsible for. While his father had been around sometimes he never had much of a father figure.

What did it mean to be a father? Chase had seen movies where the father's would tuck their children in at night, take them out to the zoo, or watch a simple Disney movie with them. He hadn't had many special moments like those with Rowan - he had been more withdrawn as Chase grew up. He could count how many times Rowan told him 'I love you' on one hand. It was sad to say but true. He needed a better example than that.

Chase was sure Cameron could read his actions pretty well. She was spending more time trying to get him to go out with her but he wanted to stay home. For no reason he felt as though he should stay home and clean. It was always a nervous habit of his and he knew that he shouldn't let it get carried away. Staying in an already clean home just for the purpose to scrub the kitchen counters just one more time is when he knew things were getting worse.

He considered seeing a psychiatrist. He hadn't seen one since he was a teenager - after the police suggested he talk about the abuse Lillian had dealt out. Chase never wanted to talk about it. He refused to and it was a moment of courage just to tell Cameron of it.

Finally Chase gave in when Cameron hit her seventh month of pregnancy. She was no longer wanting to go out, having pains and aches, along with mood-swings so she did not argue any longer about him staying home as much. He, of course, recognized it and wanted to change it. What kind of father would he be so his son/daughter if he sat at home all day feeling sorry for himself?

He didn't dare visit a psychiatrist from Plainsborough because he would never hear the end of it. He was supposed to maintain his image of the cute doctor supporting his pregnant girlfriend. How could he do that when he was seen going up the elevator to the third floor?

Instead he called a well-known psychiatrist, Mrs. Ollen, and scheduled an appointment for Saturday at 8:00 in the morning. That way he didn't have to miss work.

When Friday rolled around and Chase told Cameron where he would be leaving to she seemed pleasantly surprised. "I'm glad that you decided to confront your problems, Chase," She said sounding worried. "I was beginning to sense you were withdrawing yourself again."

"That's the last thing I want to do," He told her.

"Are you going to discuss Lillian with her?" She asked in a whisper so no one else in the hospital cafeteria would hear her.

Chase felt his stomach churn. "I don't know. Probably not."

"Then why are you going?"

_Oops._ "I have some things I have to deal with," He said as vaguely as possible.

"What things?" She probed again with more demand.

Chase could tell that she wasn't going to let this drop until he said something believable. "Alright, it's about my past, okay? It's personal. I don't want to talk about it here."

"I wish I knew more about your past, Chase," admitted Cameron, her tone sad. "You never told me much about your childhood or any family."

"That's because there's not much good in there to talk about," Chase replied. "I'm not going to depress you because of some things that happened to me a long time ago."

"But I want to know."

"Why?" He asked harshly.

Cameron was taken back by his tone. "Fine. I won't ask again," She concluded curtly.

Chase hated to snap at her like that but he didn't want to discuss his inferiority. She didn't need to be bothered with meaningless banter about how he was doubting himself when she was in such a delicate condition. She had morning sickness and her back was beginning to really bother her. Chase had to give her a back massage last night so she could finally relax and go to sleep.

"Do you want to go out to eat tonight? At Meru's?" He asked. It had been three weeks exactly when Oscar had attacked Cameron and right now he was in prison for a year. He had actually pleaded guilty, which surprised everyone, but it was for a plea deal. Still, he never apologized. "I'll bring a towel and we can eat out on the beach, just like we always used to do."

"That sounds great," Cameron said with a small smile. She was still hurt by the way he had rejected her about his childhood but she could understand. Painful memories were hard to talk about and going to Mrs. Ollen must have taken a lot of courage.

It was best to let him do what he needed to do instead of forcing him to talk to her. Maybe he would come to her one day with his stories, maybe not, but if he did she would be more than happy to listen. Although she doubted Chase saw it that way.

IIIII

For the first time in months Chase overlooked her stomach and had made the first move. On the beach, laying on a sandy blanket with two empty plates, he wrapped his arm around her middle and began to plant kisses on her neck. Cameron's breath hitched as her pleasure-centers began to rise when he reached a spot on her neck Chase knew was a very sensitive area.

"Chase . . ." She said in a gasp, running her hands through his hair.

"Shhh . . . I'm making up for all those nights I didn't do this," He said in a whisper. His hand ran down her neck, over her breasts, and massaged her thigh suggestively. "I love you, Allison Cameron."

She kissed his mouth greedily running her fingers under his shirt and over his chest hoping to bring him the same gratification he was giving her right then.

"Oh God, I love you," She said between kisses.

"So I'm God now?" He jibed letting his shirt unbutton by her fingers.

Cameron left it unanswered and left hot kisses all over his chest.

They knew that they shouldn't have sex on the beach - it would be awful if some pervert was in the restaurant and saw the couple on the beach undressed - so they gathered themselves, returned the plates and paid the bill, and went home to finish what they had started.

IIIII

Chase's legs were shaking up and down as he waited to be called into the office. The place was open from 7 AM through 8 PM and he didn't know how Mrs. Ollen ever slept.

For a moment Chase wondered if he should have had Cameron come with him. It wouldn't be for moral support, he didn't need that. Of course she had problems that needed to be dealt with. Neither of them were over Cecelia's death even with all of the time that passed. They would never be completely healed and Chase avoided conversation of her if he could.

Then again - if his childhood did come up - he didn't want Cameron to hear it. There was nothing absolutely horrible that happened to him but it wasn't good either. She would feel sorry for him, probably, and for a while would treat him as though he were damaged. He hated being treated that way and Cameron had a long history of doing that with people she liked.

"Robert Chase?" An older woman, with her glasses slipping down her nose, called out. Chase stood up and the woman smiled brightly. "Hello! I'm August Ollen. It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Chase."

Chase wasn't quite the morning person as she appeared to be so his reply was less than enthusiastic. "Um, hi. Nice to meet you too."

"Why don't you follow me and we can get right to talking," She said starting to walk down the short hallway to the last door on the right. The sound of her heels clicking on the wood floor reverberated loudly.

The office was filled with those engagement posters Chase hated. Atleast he was spared of the one with the kitten hanging on a rope, large bold words on the bottom 'Hang In There!'. Other than that it was filled with crosses and pictures of what was, he guessed, her family. She looked like she were 40 but her ring finger was empty.

Chase sat down in a chair opposite of her. She was going through some papers and pulled out a sheet that had to be the one the girl at the desk filled out when he called. It was just the basics of why he was coming and some references to his life at the moment.

"So your girlfriend is pregnant," Mrs. Ollen said with a smile, although he could hear an accusing tone in her voice. She was judging him about getting pregnant out of wedlock.

"Yes. Seven months."

"Are you excited? Nervous? Adjusting?"

"All of those, I guess," He agreed feeling awkward. When there was a silence he knew that she wanted him to continue. "But this was planned. I don't know why I feel so anxious. I want this so bad . . ."

"Oh my," She said sympathetically. Chase gave her a questioning gaze. "I'm sorry. I didn't get a chance to read your file beforehand, I've been pretty busy, and I just read about Allison's failed pregnancy. I'm so sorry to hear about that."

Chase froze for a moment, unsure of what to say or do, so he just stared blankly at floor.

"I can see that you're still very affected by this," Mrs. Ollen pointed out and Chase wanted to say a sarcastic remark but held back his tongue. "Would you like to tell me about your relationship with Allison? Is it good?"

"Um, we have some rough times but we're doing okay."

"Do you both think you can raise this baby together?"

"Well of course. If we didn't think we could, I wouldn't have gotten her pregnant. We had to try very hard to even get her pregnant," Chase said a little defensively.

"I'm not trying to offend you. I was wondering if you both are on the same page."

"Of course we are."

"Does she feel as nervous as you?"

"No, she's ecstatic," Chase answered. "I'm just . . . confused I guess on how to be a good father."

"Did you have a good relationship with your father?" Mrs. Ollen asked.

"No, not really," He shook his head. "He wasn't a home a lot. He's a famous doctor so he'd always be off on business or at a meeting or giving a lecture. Sometimes I would go just to be close to him. Seems kind of sad that I'd have to do that doesn't it?"

"Rowan Chase. Sounds familiar," she mused. "I suppose your childhood was lonelier than most. Why don't you tell me about that."

"There's not much to say. I didn't really make a lot of friends and my best friend was my pet turtle, Marsh," Chase smirked at the memory. "And the maid was really nice. She would take me to see a movie and when I was little, or she would read me a story."

"What of your mother?"

"Alcoholic," He said flatly.

"Since you were born?"

"Not really. It progressed as the years went by. She was lonely, just like I was, and she tried to do things with me but . . . she was too depressed most of the time."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

Chase said, "I didn't come here to talk about that though. I want to know why I'm so scared to be a father. It doesn't make sense."

"From what little I've heard I think you're afraid of failure," said Mrs. Ollen matter-of-factly. "You don't want to do what your parents did - alienate your son or daughter. You and your girlfriend do have jobs that require a lot of your time. I understand you need to support yourselves and your upcoming child but maybe you can cut back on work in the beginning, hm?"

"I don't think I could do that. Work is . . . well I wouldn't say I love it, my boss can be a jerk, but it's enjoyable. I don't want to cut away from it."

"Adjusting is hard," she began to say, "You have to make changes. Believe me it'll be for the better. Working is the center of your life right now. You feel no need to change it because Allison works with you, and you find it nice. Maybe there is something you can do. Take a leave with Allison."

"I planned to do that but she won't take a very long one. She loves her job," Chase said. "She was planning to buy one of those strap-on baby carriers so she could bring the baby to work with us."

"That's nice but isn't a hospital a bad place for a baby? I mean, he could catch a disease quite easily."

"I'm sure we'll take the necessary precautions," Chase was on the defense once again. Didn't she think he and Cameron already thought of that?

"Are you and Allison Christian?"

"Er, I am, but I don't think that's any of your business."

"I just hate to see babies be born out of wedlock. The Lord says to save yourself for your wedding night, but I can see that you took that into your own hands. It is awful to see such a naïveté in the younger generation."

"Allison is an Atheist so even if I cared, I doubt she would mind it either," Chase said. He was not liking her preachy attitude at all. The Aussie could hear the accusing tone hidden beneath that sweetness she tried to put on. His first impression of her was not a good one but he could tell she didn't think much of him either. "I should get going."

"Giving up already?" Mrs. Ollen teased with a smug smile.

Chase said, "I think I can handle my problems myself."

"If you came here that means you realized you need outside help," she told him with that matter-of-fact voice she seemed to use a lot. "You need help Mr. Chase."

"Not from you," He muttered under his breath than said aloud, "Atleast I tried. Have a good day, Mrs. Ollen."

_Well that went horribly_, Chase thought darkly as he left the office. _I knew that psychiatrists did nobody any good._

IIIII

"Chase, it was only one time. You're being picky," insisted Cameron as they were waiting on House to come to work. It was 9:15 and the diagnostician had yet to show up although they already had a new case to work on.

"First impressions are usually right," pointed out Foreman. He was tired of hearing them debating about the issue and decided to say something. "Just let him decide."

"Thank you," huffed Chase unfolding his arms. "See? He agrees with me."

"He only said that to shut us up," Cameron said heatedly. "But why don't you give her another try? I mean, just because she was a bit accusing doesn't mean she can't help you."

"I'd rather jump in a lake of piranha's than see another psychiatrist, I'm sorry," He mumbled.

Cameron let out a small sigh as she realized that he wasn't going to change his mind. Personally she thought he was looking for any flaw to turn her away, so he could walk away without feeling guilty, and use it as an excuse not to go back to any psychiatrist or counselor.

"Anyway I'm going to go baby-shopping today."

"For what? We have everything we need in the nursery."

"We could use more baby blankets, and put up some colorful pictures around the room since the walls are bare."

"I really do not feel like going shopping, I'm sorry," Chase told her.

Cameron was going to argue with him some more but House finally walked in.

"As for why I'm late, I got lost on the road of life," House said before anyone to query about his absence. He poured himself a cup of coffee while Cameron told him about their current patient.

"Forty five, male, presents with a rash on his back, low white count, and localized numbness. . ."

IIIII

"Chase you were so happy before," Cameron said as though it had been a far off dream. "What's changed?"

"Nothing," He lied. If it were anyone other than Cameron they would have believed him but she knew Chase better than that.

Chase was not going to tell Cameron the doubt he had of his fathering abilities. How would someone re-act to that? She couldn't know how it felt to grow up with parents who didn't pass on the girt of parenting. Cameron couldn't know how he grew up not learning by example. Sure there were bits and pieces he remembered but they were always so distance and he didn't know how to relate to his own child. He could go through the motions but it wouldn't be the same.

"Yes. Severe mood swings are normal for you," sarcastically she drawled. She looked up from her microscope to stare Chase in the eyes. "You can't fool me."

"I'm not trying to fool anyone. I'm fine," Chase said sounding exhausted at her consistent prying. "Can you stop worrying for one second? I am a grown man. I can take care of my problems."

"Right, Mr. Fix It but I will use my authority as your girlfriend to tear at your ego until you finally admit you need help," Cameron informed him.

"Ouch. If you care so much you won't want to tear down anything."

"No pain, no gain."

IIIII

Chase was in the conference room waiting for Foreman to bring back the results for one of the many fungal disease's this could possibly be. While he waited he was playing with Cameron's engagement ring that he still hadn't gotten the guts to bring out. It never seemed like the right time. He knew that he would love to get married soon but he was getting cold feet.

What if he couldn't provide Cameron and their son/daughter everything they needed? What if she found someone she loved more? What if he screwed up and she never forgave him?

He carefully looked inside of the ring to their first child's name Cecelia carefully carved there in cursive, just like her mother's on the outside. Chase planned to have all of their future children - however many that may be - and have their names chiseled into the gold ring. He had a matching ring with his name on it and Cecelia's also. It cost a pretty penny but it would be worth it.

"Aw, you shouldn't have," House feigned joy as he limped over to the Aussie. "I prefer silver but gold is better."

"Sorry, they're not for you," Chase smiled lightly.

"Pssh. Gold is over-rated anyway," he scoffed. "So which one is for Cameron?"

"The one that has Allison inscribed on it," He said in a 'duh' tone, holding it out for House to look at.

The diagnostician examined it and found Cecelia's name on the inside. "Cool," was all he said when he handed it back. "When are you going to ask her?"

"I don't know. It never seems like the right time."

"Of course it's never the right time," House said as though it were a fact. When Chase looked at him in a confused manner he explained. "There's never a _right_ time for anything to happen. Things just _happen_. Do it at the most unexpected time. When she's in the shower or when she's clipping her toenails."

"I don't know what to do. I mean, if we get married, how will I do?"

"Horrible at first but that's a fault us mortals have. We learn by experience. It sucks having to go through those first months of pregnancy. You guys had problems then because it was your second pregnancy after a failed one, and you'll have more problems on the way in a relationship. It's natures way of keeping us on our feet," House said not knowing if this was helping or hurting. Than again he didn't care too much either way. "But I think you'll make it. Don't make me a liar, either, or I'll have to deny we ever had this conversation."

"Like you would ever say you gave me advice."

"There's that," House shrugged. "Than again I'd be surprised if you listened to me."

"I listen to you more than you think."

"And I ignore you more than you think. Weird, huh?" House walked away on that sour note leaving Chase with his two rings wondering when he should make the move.

_We should be able to work through marriage pretty well_, He thought trying to shove those self-defeatist thoughts to the dark side of his mind_. We worked through Cecelia and Lillian. I know we're stronger than what anyone thinks. Even me._

IIIII

Chase wasn't going to propose that same night but he had hoped he and Cameron would have some alone time. Instead it was Mr. and Mrs. Cameron who were on their doorstep waiting for them to come home. They obviously wait a while, it was nine at night, but they seemed happy to see their daughter and Chase again.

"It's good to see you again sweetheart," Mr. Cameron said giving his not-so-tiny girl a brief hug. "How have you both been?"

"Working hard and waiting for the newest member of the Chase family."

"You're not going to have Cameron for the last name?" Mrs. Cameron sounded sad at the news.

"You two aren't even married yet. Why use his last name?" Mr. Cameron debated.

"What's the special occasion?" Cameron asked quick to change the subject. She could tell that Chase was holding back his true feelings about their dismay.

"I missed my baby. Ever since you were attacked I've been thinking about you more and more," Mrs. Cameron said giving her daughter another hug before they headed inside. "I'm sorry we couldn't come right away. We needed to gather some money up but we're here now."

"Mom, really, you didn't need to do that. I'm fine," Cameron insisted.

"Who saved you?" Her mom asked curiously looking over to Chase who felt frozen in place.

_It wasn't me_, he shamefully admitted in his mind.

"The nurses," She said.

"Where was Chase?" Mr. Cameron asked with an accusing stare.

"He was in the lab," Cameron replied. "I'm sure if he knew he would have been there but, of course, the nurses were closer."

Chase knew that Mr. Cameron would have given another comment about the absence but his daughter had quickly changed the subject to how her doctor had finally said what gender the baby was.

"You didn't tell me yet," said Chase with surprise. He hadn't gone to her last appointment because Cuddy asked him to work in NICU due to a nurse having an emergency leave. He had been immensely regretful that he couldn't go but Cameron had said it would be okay. Now he wished he would have brushed off responsibility and gone with her.

"I was saving it for a surprise during dinner," she explained. "Now that my parents are here it makes it so much better."

"So what is it?" Mrs. Cameron asked excitedly.

"It's a boy!" She exclaimed hugging her mother once again.

Chase stood there with a smile but felt a certain emptiness inside.

He didn't have any parents to share this joy with. They were both dead. Would they even care? Mom would have been too drunk and Dad would have given him a pleasant congrads then be off to some meeting. There wouldn't be any joy in that now would there?

Cameron gave him a kiss on the lips and held his hands in hers. "Ashton, wasn't it?"

"Yeah," He said with a smile looking her in her bright eyes. He gave her another kiss to show his glee for the news.

Atleast he'd always have Cameron. Maybe that was all he needed.

IIIII

**Reviews make a happy author and a happy author updates more!**

**PS: Sorry about any typos. I try to be really careful about em' but I don't have a proofreader and I have a short attention span so me and continuos reading does not go well.**


	8. Chapter 8

IIIII

_"So where do we go from here," I'll say_

_You're a shining star; You'll do great in LA_

_And I keep fixing every habit that I break_

IIIII

Mr. and Mrs. Cameron stayed in the guest room across from the couple's room. They were kind and took their daughter and her boyfriend out to dinner almost every night except when Cameron insisted that she cook dinner. She had been developing more tastes for food when she became pregnant and made something Chase couldn't figure out what it was, but whatever it happened to be made him ask for a second helping.

After a week of them staying they had to leave. Chase wasn't sure why Mr. Cameron called him out to the car while Cameron and her mother talked quickly about plans for them coming up again when the baby was born.

"I needed to talk to you about keeping Cameron safe," Mr. Cameron said. "That is my baby girl and if anything every happened to her I'm not sure what I would do."

"Oh. I wish I didn't have to say this, I would hope it would be obvious, but I should say that if I had known that she was being attacked at the hospital I would have dropped everything and done what I could."

"Robert I know you're brave but let's face it, you don't have a lot of muscle," Mr. Cameron patted the Aussie's shoulder. "We both know that you aren't strong enough to protect her."

"I know that I would be. I would never let anyone hurt Allison."

"Do you love her?"

"Again I would think it'd be obvious but yes I love her. A lot in fact."

"Tell her that often than. I can tell she loves you a lot. Don't let her down."

"I'm doing my best," Chase began to get heated from the way Mr. Cameron was putting him in a bad light. "And I would give my life to save her. She's my everything, Mr. Cameron."

"Nice words but do the actions reflect that?" He questioned.

"I don't know what you expect me to say," Chase said frustration evident in his voice and face. "What would give you the impression that I wouldn't love her?"

"Nothing," Mr. Cameron simply said. "I wanted to make sure that you're the right one for her. You've been together a long time and if and when you pop the question I hope she says yes."

"Wait, wait. Let me get this straight. Just a minute ago you said that I couldn't protect her. Now you want her to say yes to marrying me? Do you know the word hypocrisy?"

"You may not be the man I imagined she would marry but you've got a good head on your shoulders. She used to go for anyone that could lift heavy weights. More than once she came home with a body builder. Her taste has changed a lot," Mr. Cameron reminisced. "I guess mine has to change too. Welcome to the Cameron family, Robert."

"I haven't even asked-"

"You left the box on the kitchen sink a couple days ago when the phone rang. I was snoopy and looked inside and saw the matching rings," He told him. "You're good for her. Don't let me down."

"I won't," uneasily he said as he shook hands with Cameron's father.

That was one encounter that he couldn't brush off. It was comforting to know that he was welcome into the Cameron family but the old man had a weird way of getting around to saying 'Greetings and salutations, Robert Chase, to the family!'. It also got him wondering when he should ask Cameron to marry him.

He was confident she would say yes, there wasn't any reason he saw that she wouldn't, so why was he so hesitant?

IIIII

Cameron noticed that Chase seemed nervous as the day continued. They ate lunch together as they always did and Cameron was the one who made most of the conversation. She said she was going to go out and get some things for a baby boy when work was done. Maybe a blanket stitched together in the pattern of a soccer ball or some bright poster to put up in the room. Chase talked but when he did it wasn't much.

She considered asking him what he was so downhearted about but she recalled how well probing him about his troubles worked in the past. Maybe Chase needed some breathing room. With that in mind she only did small talk until they were paged about news of their patient who wasn't responding to treatment.

They day went on without much event. The patient was put on medicine for another common fungus and they hoped that this time they were right. They tried to figure out what it was but no matter how much they narrowed it down it didn't seem right. House went into his routine of sitting in front of the board over looking the symptoms wondering what they hell they were missing.

Cameron walked into his office with a suggestion. "House? Maybe we should consider histoplasmosis. I know he doesn't have any contact with cat feces or-"

"Cameron do you think Chase is the one for you?" House asked out of curiosity.

"Er . . ." She was momentarily stunned by the question and asked, "What makes that your business?"

"What if someone else came along? Would you go for them?"

"No. Why?"

"No reason."

"Are you hitting on me?" She asked bluntly.

"You wish," House chuckled darkly. "I just wonder how you got into a relationship with him. He's not like me."

"Maybe that's why I love him so much," she retorted.

House found messing with her proved entertaining enough to probe further. "I'm curious how you can go from your previous husband who was dying, to me and we all know I'm 'damaged', and go to Chase who isn't really damaged in any way. Daddy problems doesn't warrant enough sympathy for an empathy machine like you."

"So you're saying I only go for these 'damaged' people?"

"Mostly."

"What are you trying to say to me? That I should dump Chase because he isn't damaged enough?"

"No. Curiosity is all."

"Curiosity killed the cat, House," She said gruffly.

"Good thing I'm not a cat then."

"Can we please go back to our jobs?"

"You responded to me. You didn't have to," reminded House before Cameron went on with the possibilities of histoplasmosis.

IIIII

_She will say yes. She will say yes. She will say yes_.

That was the repeating mantra Chase had playing over and over inside his head. They both had gotten home and Cameron was preparing dinner. He had to make this count. What could he do to make this special? He surely couldn't do something cheesy but nothing to far-out that it would seem wrong to ask during.

The dinner was nothing special. Some baked potatoes and macaroni. Chase kept flipping the box open, staring at the ring inside, and closed it. Maybe he should have gotten a diamond ring. Did she even like gold?

"Chase, dinner's ready!" called out Cameron.

"Coming!" He shouted back from down the hall where he had been pacing. He shoved the small velvet box into his pocket and went into the kitchen. "Looks good."

"Do you want sour cream?" She asked going into the refrigerator.

"No, butter."

The dinner went on with them exchanging some information about their day. Cameron had accidentally slipped out about House asking if she thought Chase was the one for her. Of course this caught the Aussie's undivided attention.

"What did you say?"

"That it was none of his business."

"Oh . . ."

"And then he asked if someone else came along would I leave you, and of course I said no," Cameron said picking away the potato's insides. "What about you?"

"Mmph?" He grunted with a mouth full of food.

Cameron giggled and repeated, "What about you? Do you think I'm the one for you?"

After swallowing Chase answered, "Yes you are." He felt the box inside his pocket but couldn't bring it out. After a moment's passing Cameron went back to eating and probably thought that was all she would get out of him.

_Way to go Romeo_, he taunted himself. _That was a chance and you blew it. Stop giving short answers and tell her what you really feel._

Chase opened his mouth with the words on the very edge of his tongue.

Riiiing.

_Damnit all!_

Cameron got up and answered it. Chase could tell from the moment she put it against her ear that something was wrong. Her face seemed to contort at whatever news she just received and tears began to well up into her eyes.

"Oh-Oh my God. Who would do such a thing?"

"Allison?" Chase asked slowly getting up from his chair to walk over to her.

"I don't know! Some crazy maniac? No, no. Nobody we know. Oh my God . . ."

Chase became more alarmed asking harshly, "What's wrong?"

"Did it happen to any of the other graves?"

_Graves?_

Chase could feel his heart drop into his stomach at the mention. Was she talking about . . .?

"We'll be right over. Bye."

"Allison tell me-"

Cameron let out a shuddering sigh and said, "Someone robbed Cecelia's grave. They . . . they took her out, shredded her clothes, and made away with h-her body. Whoever did it dug up four other graves too and took out the b-baby's body's . . ." Cameron began to cry.

Chase was going to try and soothe her but he was in a shocked state. Who would rob a baby's grave? What sicko would put the parents through that? It's horrible enough to loose a child once but now even her body had been taken away. It left Chase feeling all the more helpless in his role of a father.

"Let's go," Cameron said suddenly.

He snapped back to reality. Cameron had gotten the keys already and was guiding him towards the door.

IIIII

It seemed to be a dream.

Police. Freshly dug-up graves. The once pretty clothes that had adorned Cecelia were carelessly torn up near her tombstone. Her coffin was eerily untouched while all of the other children's had been smashed with a blunt object, most likely suspect was a hammer.

None of the families knew who would have done this. There were no connections between the adults. Cameron and Chase didn't recognize any of the other weeping men and women. They stood at their daughter's grave both of them crying. Cameron was crying outloud but Chase was much more quiet wiping the tears away before they could make their way down his face.

They were assured that the police would do everything to try and arrest whoever robbed their daughter's grave. The man working at the cemetery began to fill the graves once again with dirt.

Cameron picked up the tiny pieces of cloth that had been covering Cecelia's body. "Why would someone do this?"

"Probably some sick pervert," Chase snarled in anger for the misery whoever was causing them. "Hopefully they'll find him."

"Even if they do find him I don't know if Cecelia will be in one piece."

"We have to hope, Allison," Chase said. There wasn't much conviction in his voice although he wished there was.

"This is the last thing we need," She said. "Why do these things keep happening to us? Can't we just be happy for a while?"

Chase hugged her hoping to calm her down. "I'm sorry. If I knew I'd . . . I'm sorry."

Although they did not know it their thoughts were one in the same.

_I failed again._

"Chase do you think one of Oscar's family members could have done this?" Cameron asked as the cemetery worker began to fill Cecelia's grave.

"If it was they wouldn't have robbed the other graves."

"Maybe they did it to throw us off."

Chase shook his head. "I couldn't really tell you. Even if his family was upset I doubt they'd be this heartless about it. It would take someone with ice in their veins to dig out a child's grave."

"I feel so bad for everybody else," Cameron looked around. "Those parents over there had two children. I over heard them talking to the police. Their twin boys died in a house fire, they were only eleven months, and now they're both missing."

"We can't focus on everyone," said Chase coldly. "I only care about finding Cecelia."

"Maybe if we talk to the other parents we can find a connection. There had to be _something_."

"There are a lot of sick people out there that do unthinkable things for their own selfish reasons," Chase reminded her sadly. "I wish there was something connecting us, so we could track down the criminal, but there isn't. I don't know these people."

"You're not even going to try?" Cameron said hotly. "Don't you want to find Cecelia?"

"Of course I do! But have small talk with them isn't going to do it."

"We have to think of something," she sounded desperate. She was now that she was re-living the pain of loosing Cecelia all over again. "I can't take this! I can't loose her again!"

Chase couldn't stop her from running out of the graveyard with her head in her hands. He was going to let her cry it out a little but he knew that Cameron needed someone to comfort her right now.

She had locked the car and Chase was trying to talk her into opening the doors again but she wasn't having it. Cameron was crying too hard to possibly think straights. Her mind was racing as she tried to figure out why someone would hurt them, or anyone of those parents, like this. They were using Cecelia and those other children for their own sick needs without having a second-thought about how this would affect the parents.

"Allison, please. Open the door. We can go home and talk this out!" Chase said loudly banging on the driver's side door. Cameron was in the passenger's seat trying to cry out her pain. "Allison! I know it hurts, it really does, but if we don't try to figure this out the police have nothing to go on!"

Cameron started to hyperventilate, waving her hands at her face while trying to calm down. "Allison, listen to me. It's okay. Cecelia is in heaven right now whether her body is in her coffin or not. Her soul is fine. We're going to have a baby boy soon, right? Think of that. Shhh, it's okay . . ."

The blonde eventually guided her into a composed state where she could think of what she was doing.

"Think of all of the fun we'll have. Ashton will stitch your heart right up."

"Do you think we can protect him?" Cameron asked, her voice hoarse from weeping.

"Of course we can. We couldn't do anything more for Cecelia. This was beyond our control."

"I-I'm sorry. I just . . . I guess I let myself go for a minute," Cameron apologized meekly. She unlocked the doors and let Chase get inside. "Are you okay?"

"I should be," He answered honestly. "If you will be."

"Yeah. I just can't think of anyone . . . we don't have any enemies."

"Like I said before it could be the regular madman running around."

"I wish it was someone we knew so we could get our baby back . . ." Cameron said barely above a whisper.

Chase reached over and squeezed her hand and started the car. "Do you want to go out for dessert?"

"No I don't think so."

"I'll get you ice cream with hot peppers."

"That was a one time thing!" Cameron laughed softly. "I'm more into pickles, mayonnaise, and cottage cheese all mixed in one bowl. That's really good."

"I'll make you that when we get home then. We'll watch a movie and relax, okay?" Chase said.

"I don't know if I can-"

"You can and will. If we don't relax we might go insane." He smiled trying to joke with her. Although his mind was wracked with horrible images he tried to keep sane for Cameron's sake.

"Thanks, Chase. I'm not sure what I'd do without you."

He leaned over leaving a light kiss on her lips. "Love you too."

So they left leaving the nightmare into the depths of their mind. They would avoid thinking of this new tragedy before it became a black hole ripping their souls to pieces; just like Cecelia's dress was.

IIIII

"Cameron, I heard it on the news this morning and I wanted to say that I'm sorry," Cuddy said. She had seen the other woman come in with Chase and decided to give her condolences. "Do you have any idea who would do such a thing?"

"No," Cameron replied. "We're at a loss for who or what did it."

"I doubt that you two have any enemies," Cuddy said with disbelief. "That just makes it worse when bad things happen to good people."

"Cuddy, Chase, Cameron! So how did that threesome go last night, huh? Lots of fun for all involved?" House interrupted loud enough for everyone to hear. He limped towards them waiting with them for an elevator to become available.

"You have Clinic Duty at one, House. Do not be late," reminded Cuddy quickly.

"Riiight because I just love picking toys out of kid's noses and making sure no one goes home without a finger poking into every orifice."

"Thank you for that lovely image," Cuddy drawled. She turned to Cameron and Chase with a sympathetic look and then left to her office.

The elevator opened up and the three went in there and headed to the floor of House's office. House began to whistle in the uncomfortable silence before saying, "I watched the news this morning."

"I know where you're going with this and while we appreciate-" Cameron began but was cut off.

"If you ever do find the guy let me know. This cane has many uses other than getting me around, you know," House said swinging it in the air for example. "So any idea?"

"No," Chase sighed. He knew he and Cameron would be answering that question a lot for the rest of the day.

That did happen as they guessed it would. Cameron and Chase couldn't escape the pitied looks from the staff and even some patients who recognized the two doctors. It was as though it were Cecelia's death all over again. The same looks, the same sorrow in their voices, and most frustrating of all was the overwhelming pity. They enjoyed comfort from their friends but from complete strangers, while a nice gesture, was not what they needed.

A constant reminder turned out to be torture for the mind. Cameron couldn't force herself to eat. All she could think about is Cecelia. She tried to find something she loved, like a chocolate bar, but she mostly sat about rubbing at her pregnant stomach thinking of her lost and dead child. It almost caused her to cry at one point in the day but she managed to stop by burying herself into her paperwork.

Chase was no better off. He did crossword puzzles to keep his mind off of his troubles but it didn't do much for him. Even TV didn't make his mind bland. Chase considered taking a personal day to grieve but what would that achieve? They had a patient to take care of. They were close to finding the right diagnosis. He couldn't focus on the dead when there were so many close to death.

He expected Cameron to come to him to find comfort. Instead he found out that she was in the cafeteria with Wilson on a break. He found himself feeling partly jealous but told himself to calm down. Chase did not want to be one of those guys that would forbid or become enraged when his girlfriend would talk to another guy. Cameron had no interest in him, as far as Chase knew, and Wilson had said he wouldn't try to take Cameron away.

Chase left the cafeteria rubbing his head. He felt a headache coming on.

It was only getting worse as the day wore on so he figured on his lunch break he would go out to get some Tylenol from the house. After telling Cameron where he was going he went to the first floor and when the elevator door opened he was ripped out by some large man and thrown onto the floor.

"What the hell?" Chase shouted as he got up. His head throbbed and the force of the fall caused his vision to swirl.

"I want my kid to get a transplant now!" someone roared. A shot was fired off into the ceiling as a warning. "I have three livers here and one of 'em should be good enough to fix my kid!"

Cuddy was already at the desk trying to calm the armed man down. Beside him was a cooler that probably contained the livers. A woman standing behind him, probably his girlfriend or wife, was holding a sickly baby.

"Sir we can't do it. We don't know where you got those livers, probably on the black market, but we can't and won't do it!" Cuddy answered. "The police are coming anyway so don't add assault or attempted murder to the list."

"Lady, I want the transplant team! I don't give a damn if you think you can't do it. You will do it," He pressed the gun onto Cuddy's chest right over her heart. "Or I will kill you. Understand _that_?"

IIIII

**I want to apologize for this late update. Life has been a little hecktic and I just haven't had the time to get this pre-read and done. But atleast it's up! **

**Reviews would be great!**


	9. Chapter 9

IIIII

_And she's trying to sleep it off_

_With her head on my shoulder_

_And I'm trying to keep it out_

_Of my thoughts when I hold her_

IIIII

"You need to understand that we can not perform a transplant without a lot of complicated steps. If you need a new liver we can put your child on a list-" Cuddy began but was smacked to the floor by the offending man. A person from behind the desk tried to come to the Dean's aid but the man pushed her back into her original position.

"I don't want her on a list! I want her to get better!" He roared. "I can't lose my only baby. We can't."

"Ronald, maybe this was a bad idea . . ." The woman behind him softly said.

"Listen to her," Cuddy said refusing to be quieted. "This is a bad idea. If you need her to get better do this the right way. If you two are in jail who's going to take care of the baby? Who's going to get her onto the list?"

"You are, lady," Ronald snarled picking her up by her hair. "Now let's go into your office and discuss this."

"Do you promise not to hurt any of my staff?" Cuddy asked.

"I can't promise you anything."

"Than we aren't going to my office."

"Do you want me to shoot you?" Ronald threatened her again with the gun against her chest. "I'm a monster when I want to be."

"Don't hurt her," the woman said. "Please. I just want our baby to survive."

"Shutup!" Ronald spat at her. "We do things my way. I've waited too long doing things your way, Shana, and it's never worked."

Chase steadily walked up and got a foot behind Cuddy before Ronald noticed him. "What do you want, pansy?" The tall man ordered.

"Where did you get those livers?" Chase asked trying to calm his voice down. If this was what he thought it was he could not let this man out of his sights until he was in a nice, cold cell with a long sentence.

"You were probably to busy watched Oprah to watch the news so you wouldn't know me."

"You admit that you did the grave robbing? At Forests Cemetery?" Chase questioned. He could feel his fists begin to ball up. He was never much of a fighter, and he had no prior training in fighting, but he was going to land a punch on this man if it was the last thing he did.

"I didn't admit to nothing. Now get back before I shoot you too."

"No!" Chase snapped. "Did you rob my daughter's grave?"

"Chase don't do anything rash," Cuddy warned not looking over her shoulder. The cold metal of the gun was keeping her alert at all times of the man at the other side of the gun movements.

The Aussie ignored her. "Did you?"

"Look, the kid's liver wasn't any good so I had to throw it away. I did random spots, okay? I'd go and bury her again but there's too many cops around."

"You bastard!" All logical thinking was lost. Chase chose to forget about the gun and launched himself at the man. He managed to get him to the floor by surprise. Shana gasped and began to weep miserably as Chase began to punch Ronald in his face, not caring how hard he hit, but just that he connected with the face of the man who had violated his daughter's grave. "How could you do that? What's _wrong_ with you? That was my _daughter_! You had no right!"

Ronald was much stronger and grabbed both of Chase's arms by the wrist. He pulled him over his head and the blonde landed harshly on his back. His head began to throb in agony from another collision on his head. He was aware of people shouting and Ronald returning the several punches through kicks in the ribs.

"I'll kill you!" Ronald shouting picking up his gun. "Do you want to die?"

Chase tried to move but Ronald put his boot onto the younger man's chest to keep him on the floor. He painfully dug the heel of his boot into Chase's chest making him gasp in pain.

"Don't shoot him!" Cuddy shouted.

"Why shouldn't I?"

"Let's go into my office. Just don't shoot anybody, got it?"

"You're not one to make deals here, lady," Ronald said.

"Please Ron! Leave the poor man alone. How would you feel if someone stole from Miranda's grave?" She looked down to the ill child in her arms and cooed at her. Her long blonde hair covered her face which Chase figured was contorted from shame. "He's our victim. Don't victimize him all over again."

"This isn't about his poor little dead girl. I don't care! I want my child to live! If it takes robbing a few graves than so be it!" He gestured to the cooler. "The livers are in there!"

"They're no good by now," Cuddy informed him. She expected him to begin ranting about how she was wrong but he silently waited for her to continue. "I don't know what graves you robbed but the livers must be in horrible condition by now. I know Cecelia's was-"

"You've got to be kidding me!" Ronald shouted stomping his foot two times on Chase's chest. "This is bull! You're lying! You just don't want to do it!"

"I would do it, yes, for the sake of your child. But only if she gets on the transplant list and receives a healthy, live liver."

"We can't afford it! Our insurance won't cover it! This is the only way," Ronald uttered sounding vicious. "I need you to put her on the list if those livers aren't any good. If you don't I might just have to spread some blood around here."

Their baby, Miranda, started to cry. Ronald didn't abandon his position because he knew that Chase would attack him given the chance. Shana cradled the crying child, her puffy eyes shining from her constant crying. Meanwhile Cuddy was praying the police would be arrive at any minute. She would not put it past the crazed father to let loose and shoot everyone he deemed unworthy of further negotiation.

_If I can keep him going for a few minutes and buy time the police will stop this madness_, Cuddy thought. She didn't need to do that because there were new arrivals on the first floor. _I guess the news hasn't gotten anywhere else yet. This is going to get ugly._

Unfortunately it was Cameron and Wilson chattering pleasantly until they saw the scene. They were going to close the door but the same heavy man who had pulled Chase out was waiting for the arrival of anyone, and he reached in and grabbed the two and pulled them out.

"Cameron!" shouted Chase from underneath Ronald's foot. "This is the guy who robbed Cecelia's grave!"

"Shutup!" Ronald snapped putting the gun between Chase's eyes.

"Don't shoot him!" Cameron screamed trying to run, hardly registering that the man would shoot her in an instance, but Wilson held her back.

"You'll only get hurt. You're pregnant thus you can't go and fight!" warned Wilson in a hiss.

"But Chase . . ."

"I know but he'll make it."

"Stay back!" Chase shouted despite the gun. He tried to swallow his cowardice and move but he couldn't find the strength. He stared up at Ronald who was obviously fearful of the outcome. It wasn't going the way he planned. "Look, I don't know who you are and I don't like you, but I've had the pain of losing a kid too. Twice, thanks to you. You can't let yourself become a murderer because of it! Especially in front of your own daughter."

"I swear to God I will blow your-"

"I know I wouldn't put my daughter in the danger you're putting yours in. Do you honestly think you could come in here with three stolen livers and-" He was silenced by being stuck with the butt of the gun across his jaw. That got him to shutup although he had plenty more to say.

"Leave him alone!" Cameron shouted from across the room. She was between tears and rage.

"Shutup! I don't mind hurting a pregnant girl, you know, so don't think I won't hurt you." He pointed his gun in Cameron's direction and laughed as fear became apparent in her eyes. Wilson pulled her behind him to protect her. "So she has two boyfriends? How nice."

Then came the relieving sounds of sirens.

"Don't think they can save you!" Ronald warned.

"I'm giving up," Shana said with a sob. She shuddered and walked to Cuddy who was trying to ignore the pain on her temple where she had been struck. She handed the baby to Cuddy saying, "Please help her. If we're going to be arrested . . . do what you can, _please_? She deserves a second chance. We don't."

Cuddy's features softened. "You're doing the right thing Shana."

"Please don't hold Ronald's actions against her. He's not . . . he's lost his mind," She whispered as the cops began to walk towards the building. "I'm so, so sorry . . ."

"I'll do what I can," Cuddy said with a soft smile.

"Shana! What the hell are you doing?" Ronald left his hostage Chase and walked over to his wife. "Don't give our child to her!"

"I'm doing the best for our kid since you've obviously unable to!" She snapped bravely and in return got a strike across her mouth for the daring comment.

"Come out and give up or we will shoot!" One policeman shouted.

Ronald growled in frustration and was unsure of what to do.

"Give yourself up," said Shana weeping once again. "Don't hurt anyone else. Please don't do it."

"I am giving you until the count of ten! And do not assault anyone on your way or we will consider you a threat and shoot!" The policeman shouted once again.

Two shots rang out.

The sounds of sirens and shouting only made Chase's head pound even more violently. He tried to cover his ears but it was in vain. The intensity of th pain blocked out all of his perceptions. Was there a pain somewhere besides his temple? He felt it, deep within his thigh, but his mind ached horribly.

He was faintly aware of someone touching him but it wasn't a touch that was meant to be alarming. It was a soft one, on his chest, and he felt his shirt beginning to be lifted up. Everytime he breathed the bruises on his chest would pulse painfully.

Chase tried to focus but found the light of day to be too much. He closed his eyes letting the voices, alarms, and sirens to swim all together. He groaned when someone tried to shove him back into reality with a pull of his arm. A female voice kept calling his name. His first name.

"Robert! Robert! Are you okay?"

As he came back he felt a sharp, violent pain in his thigh. He tried to sit up but the bruised flesh of his chest wouldn't allow such sudden movement. He laid back down letting fingers run through his hair.

"Robert? Please talk to me."

"My head . . . hurts really bad," He finally said. "And my chest . . . ow, my thigh too."

"Ronald shot you. I guess it was too much with your headache and you were unconscious for a minute," said the female voice. His eyes focused onto it and he saw the face of his loving girlfriend Cameron. "In the leg only, thank God. We're going to need to get it out. You're going into surgery to make sure that it didn't hit anything important, okay?"

"Gonna' knock me out with some good stuff?" He tried to joke.

Cameron nodded, her tears falling onto Chase's chest. "Yeah. You'll be fine. I know you will be. I love you so much. Please be okay."

"Love you too . . ."

"We're going to lift you onto the gurney," said Cuddy. "Ready?"

Pain shot up in his leg and he groaned and he was successfully placed onto the gurney.

"Cameron are you okay?" Chase asked.

Cameron could not help but let even more tears fall at the question. Even in such pain he was thinking about her.

"I'm fine. I wasn't hurt."

"Thank you, Wilson, for standing in the way," He managed to get that out before his head pounded from the stress of the sounds. It felt as though every movement, every squeak, and every gulp of breath were magnified by one hundred.

"No problem."

"This is crazy," He heard Cuddy say. "I can't believe it."

_Neither can I_, agreed Chase in thought. _I hope they find Cecelia's body and she can rest in peace . . ._

IIIII

Cameron was sitting in the waiting room where the shared feeling was timorous. How could this have happened? Why the same hospital where they worked at? Why was everything taking a horrible turn now that they were finally going to have another child?

Cameron wasn't sure what to grieve for first - her daughter's victimization or Chase with his gun wound. The surgeon's said it hadn't torn any ligaments and did not pass through any main arteries. They said he would be in crutches for a while, and some recurrent pain, but he should be okay.

"Allison? Here," said the familiar voice of Wilson. He held out a cup of soda and she took it gratefully and sipped on it. He sat beside her and stayed silent for a while.

"He's going to be okay," Cameron said.

"I know."

"What happened to Ronald? Is he going to jail?"

"Yeah. But Shana . . . she's not in good shape. The bullet penetrated her spinal cord. She won't be able to walk, and one of her lungs collapsed. They aren't sure that she'll make it through the night."

"It takes a complete coward to shoot his wife in her back," Cameron hissed.

"There's no news on Cecelia. I'm sorry."

Cameron said softly. "I need to see Cecelia back into her grave. But . . . he took out her liver-" She began to shake and took in a deep breath "-and I don't know what else he did to her. Did he throw her in the garbage? Did he take out other organs?"

"The police will found out about that," said Wilson and he began to rub Cameron's back to help her calm down. "I know this is a difficult situation but things will get better."

"They can't get any worse."

"Do you need anything else?"

Cameron looked over to Wilson, her eyes beginning to feel dry from crying so much, and she let herself crumble into her friend's arms. She hugged him with her face buried into the crook of his neck. A little stunned from the sudden contact Wilson didn't return it at first but did when he knew comfort was what she needed the most.

He removed the hair out of her eyes when she pulled herself away. Cameron felt that she shouldn't move any closer to him or she would do something that she would regret later.

"Thank you," Cameron uttered gently.

When she smiled at him Wilson could feel his heart pound against his chest. He wished that he could make a move right then. Cameron looked as beautiful as she ever been even if she had sorrow in her features. He wanted to kiss those lips that were parted in such a way that they looked inviting . . .

_Get a grip! She's off limits! No go, no go!_

"Er, do you need me to get you anything else? Like something to eat?"

"We just ate," She reminded him.

"Oh. Yeah. I guess we did so . . . if you do need anything I'll be in my office. Page me when he's ready for visitors."

Cameron nodded, thanked him again, and he left.

Not knowing it, her heart was pounding just as much as his had.

IIIII

Chase's mind was obscured from the drugs pumped in through the IV. His chest and headache were feeling much better thanks to the opiates but his leg was throbbing still. He never thought he would be a victim of a gun shot but lady luck was not with him that day. His frustration and anger at the man who shot him was as heavy as ever.

He wanted to punish him for what he had done to his daughter's grave. The very idea of him opening her up, in an impromptu surgery, to check out her liver made him physically ill.

The only thing he could find salvaging in this whole ordeal was atleast Ronald was doing it to save his own daughter. Chase could understand how the helplessness of not being able to help your child is maddening. Though that was no excuse for shooting up a hospital demanding to be at the very top of the list through anger and fear.

He would be out the next day if all went well. He would be on crutches for a while but if it meant getting out of the hospital bed all would be better. When he was cleared for having visitors, and was less fuzzy from the anesthesia, the first person he wanted to see was Cameron.

Wanting and getting are different things. He was visited first by House who seemed indifferent to Chase's situation. The first thing that popped out of Chase's mouth was, "Where's Cameron?"

"Hello to you too, goldilocks," said House. "Then again I guess seeing a gorgeous girl would be your first preference to your boss."

"Yeah. Where is she?"

"She went home to change clothes. When she sat up she spilled orange soda all over the place. Big mess," House said briefly. He took a seat at Chase's bedside and they were unable to read eachother's faces, which bothered them greatly, which in turn didn't make the ambiance seem quite so friendly. "How's the leg?"

"Better than yours."

"Oooh, but you get better drugs. What's up with that?" House scoffed in mock-frustration.

"They're giving me too much drugs. I'm surprised the walls aren't melting yet."

"You need LSD for that kind of effect," House chipped in. "I could get you some."

"Yeah, uh, _no_," Chase said not believing he actually suggested it.

"I wasn't going to get you any, anyway. That's all _mine_," House admitted. "So I guess you'll be needing crutches for that. Who else to teach you the ways of the limp than me?"

"I'm sure it won't be that hard to maneuver in crutches."

"Pssh, amateurs," House huffed. "Anyway I'm only here to keep you company until Cameron comes back, since she demanded it, and while I'm here to suffer I might as well watch General Hospital. Where's the remote for the TV?"

"I am not going to sit through your soap opera. I hate those sort of things," groaned Chase like a six year old.

House paused and shook his head. He turned on the TV and flicked through the channels until he landed on the right one. He leaned back, saying, "Riiight, because you're too manly for this, aren't you?"

"If you're trying to make me feel better, here's news: the plan backfired. Go away."

Chase grabbed the remote back from House and turned the TV off. House was going to take it back but there was something troubling in the other man's eyes that told him that he wasn't joking.

Luckily House was saved from having to reply to that - and he was going to, rather nastily - since he hadn't wanted to do it in the first place. Thankfully he did not have to admit it to Chase, who ignored his presence as soon as Cameron entered the room.

"Chase!"

"Allison!"

Cameron ran towards Chase, hugging him in what any bystander would think was an attempt to break his bones, but Chase returned it.

"I brought you some puzzles. I know you want to keep busy so . . ." Cameron brought them out of her purse and put them on Chase's side-table. "How are you feeling?"

"Groggy but I'll be fine."

House stood up, patted Cameron on the shoulder and said, "Don't ride him too rough."

Cameron smirked and let her boss walk out. She sat by her boyfriend and he grabbed her hand holding onto it tightly. They sat there in silence for a while, not sure what to say to one another. Cameron had no news of Cecelia's whereabouts and Chase had a throbbing in his leg as his body tried to repair the damage. He wanted desperately to find out any inkling on Cecelia, but one look in Cameron's eyes told him that she was not ready to admit their child's grave and body had been violently violated. So he had to grit his teeth constantly reminding himself that even though Cecelia was his daughter, she was dead, and the living came before the dead.

He found his hand laying on his girlfriends large stomach. Chase had been so lost in thought that he didn't pay attention to outside interference. That was until he felt a light _thump_, bringing him back to reality, and his lovers smiling features.

Then it hit him: The baby had moved!

"I can't wait," Cameron sighed. "I'm so anxious. I want a baby so bad. Whenever I see another woman with a baby I think of, you know, our own child."

"Cecelia?"

She stiffened at the name. "Yeah. Her too."

There was an uncomfortable silence. They were waiting on eachother to say something comforting but the words were stuck in their throats.

"I'm sorry," Chase apologized. "All I wanted was to hurt him for what he's done to you and me and I forgot about everyone else. I endangered everyone's lives for someone who isn't even alive!"

"She is your daughter, Chase, dead or not," Cameron said sternly. She gripped his hand within her small ones. "You were driven by an instinct to protect your family even if who you're protecting isn't alive. No one would blame you for that."

"I wasn't protecting her. I was avenging her. There's a big difference."

"You know what I mean," she said sounding impatient. "I don't blame you. Cuddy doesn't blame you. We all understand."

"No you don't!" He snapped. "I couldn't help her from dying and now I couldn't even protect her grave! I'm-I'm a horrible father! How can I trust myself with another kid when I can't save them?"

"There are things we can't do. We can't stand at the grave twenty-four-seven!" Cameron didn't give into snapping back but she was very close to doing so. "And if you're going to blame yourself than I'm at fault to. I'm her mother. Does it make me a bad mother to try and save her but I couldn't? No. It would make me a bad mother _not_ to try!

"Can't you see Chase? Trying is all we can do. We're doing the best we can but sometimes our best doesn't work. It's absurd to think you can _always_ make things perfect."

"But I should be able to. I'm the man of the family. I'm the-"

"Hero?" Cameron finished the sentence for him.

Chase scoffed, "I wish."

"I don't think anyone can be a hero, in the sense of Superman or Batman, if that's what your definition of a hero is. Someone that goes in and constantly saves the day? Has the answers every time? Effortlessly doing the right thing?"

Chase wasn't sure where she was going with this. "That would be a hero, yeah," he drawled.

"A fictional one," She corrected. "A human definition shouldn't be that. I think a hero is someone who try's to fix things. Who is there for their loved ones, and even if they can't help them, they're there. Maybe Cecelia was alive for only a couple of hours but you were there by her side. You held her hand as she passed away. What better father could she ask for?"

Chase stayed silent trying to soak her words in. He had left Cameron, after making sure she would be okay, and was with Cecelia in the ICU for a long time. He had been there when she stopped breathing and he had tried to find any disease or illness that would have her symptoms.

"This has been bothering you for a while," She stated instead of questioned. Cameron could tell from the solemn look on the face that she hit the right nerve.

"Allison, I appreciate you trying to cheer me up, but I don't want to talk-"

"Chase, please. Tell me while we're still in this grieving mood. If I let it drop you may never tell me."

Chase resigned his toughened shell and said slowly, "Ever since you were attacked I've felt helpless. I wasn't there for you."

"Chase . . ."

"Your father pulled me aside before he and your mother left," Chase finally said. "The conversation was short but it got to me. He didn't think I could protect you. He said I wasn't very strong, and that I shouldn't let you down, so I've been sitting on that all of this time. I can't get over how far Oscar got before someone intervened. And it wasn't even me!"

"Don't blame that on you! You couldn't have known."

"I wish-"

"We wish a lot of things. I wish that I didn't accidentally puke on my then boyfriend in the tenth grade. I wish I hadn't crashed into a pole on my first driving test. I wish that I graduated at the top of my class. Do you see how this could drive anyone crazy? You need to stop it."

"I want to be there for you."

"You are or are you not the one that's been living with me for a year?"

"It's hard to explain. I'm not too good with words."

Cameron pressed her forehead against his and looked him right in the eyes. "I love you, Robert."

"I love you too but please, call me Chase. You're right in that it does sound better."

Cameron smiled lacing her fingers with his. She kissed him gently on the mouth, and he tried to lean into the affectionate kiss, but she pulled away.

"Nu-uh Mr. Chase. You've got to heal before you get into some rough activities."

"You're a tease," He chuckled kissing her on the cheek before she could pull away entirely. "What time is it?"

"Time for you to rest."

"I think we need to get an animal. Like a dog."

"Uhhh . . . that's sudden."

Chase smirked. "A big dog. An attack dog. I'd feel safer that way, so if you're home alone, I know you've got some protection."

"What am I? Helpless?"

"Right. Your one hundred and ten pound body is going to beat the hell out of some burglar."

"I'm pregnant. I'm heavier."

"Who forgot that it's bad to fight when you're pregnant?" reminded the Aussie.

"I'll think about it," Cameron grumbled. "I prefer cats though. And if we get a dog it can't be a Great Dane or a Saint Bernard. I don't want to wake up one morning and our baby be hanging from their jaws."

"A Golden Retriever?"

"I said I'll think about it," She said more strictly.

Chase smiled and dumped out the box of puzzle pieces that formed a church. He looked at the church, a large marble fixture with flowers surrounding the outside, and a large cross at the entrance. He found it touching that she bought him something related to Christianity when she was an ardent Atheist.

IIIII

**Hooray for Cameron/Chase fluff.**

**Reviews make me write faster!**


	10. Chapter 10

IIIII

_Nothings wrong so long as you know that_

_Someday, somehow_

_I'm gonna make it alright but not right now_

_I know you're wondering when_

IIIII

"Here she comes, Miss America . . ." House sang softly as Chase clumsily made his way into the conference room.

"Shutup!" He snapped and sat down on the chair. He rubbed his leg, trying to think away the burning sensation under his skin, and in the back of his mind he wondered if it was the same pain House felt every day.

Cameron sat down beside him a look of worry etched on her face. It had only been a couple of days and Chase was insisting that he come back to work. She thought it would be appropriate for him to rest just one more day but he wouldn't hear of it.

As they went through the rounds on their newest patient Chase found that he wasn't feeling as fresh as he thought he would be. His leg was throbbing as though the muscle itself had been obliterated entirely and was trying to sew itself anew. He would never judge House again on making stupid rash decisions when he was in serious pain. It was hard to put it aside and think of work.

As the three lackey's were sent off to do some tests House said, "Chase. You're with me. In my office."

"Why?"

"I enjoy seeing you hop. Go on," House gestured to his office while sipping on his cup of coffee. "I promise I won't call you Little Bunny Foo-Foo if you just go in there."

"I have work-"

"Are my conversations really that bad?" House interrupted. "Stop stalling and get into my office."

Chase gave up, and after an apologetic look from both Foreman and Cameron, he went into the office with his poker face on. Once again since they couldn't read eachother's faces it didn't set up a very nice mood to start a conversation with.

"What do you want?" Chase asked briskly.

"First, genius, I wanted to point out that your crutches are too high," House said swiveling in his chair.

Chase glanced down at them and set them down a notch. He had to admit - non-verbally of course - that House had been right.

"Second, I wanted to give you something. It'll take me a moment to find it . . ." House said. He grabbed his bookbag from underneath his desk and started to look around inside the disheveled bag. He pulled out a sizable figurine of Superman. When he handed it to Chase it would be an understatement to say that he was only confused.

"Er . . . this is beyond odd. Why would I want this?"

"Am I the only one that thinks your wife is pregnant with a son, or did you just miss the boat on why she got so big in the last few months?" House said knowing Chase would catch on.

"Oh. Oh!" Chase finally did and added, "Thank you. It's not exactly a cuddle buddy for an infant but I'll make sure that he'll play with it when he's older."

"I've had that since I was seven," House gave a sudden explanation of it's existence. "My Mom gave it to me for my seventh birthday. I told her that I wanted _Spider_man but she mistook me for _Super_man. I'm not sure how she did it but it happened. I still kept it though, Superman can jump over buildings and all, and it's in fine condition."

"Then why would you give it to my kid? This thing could be worth a lot to a Superman junkie."

"Why _not_ give it to your kid?" House shot back.

"I'm not sure if I want to take it. It's from your childhood," said Chase hesitantly. "Are you positive?"

"No, I'm negative for HIV but thank you for asking," House said. When Chase let out a frustrated sigh he added, "If you don't walk out of here right now with it I'll have to engage in a cripple fight with you. And believe me, I've had more experience."

"It'll be odd for a guy in crutches walking out with a superhero figurine."

"It's an image I've been wanting to see."

"Well, thanks. I'm sure he'll will love it."

"In exchange I ask to name the kid," House said avoiding saying 'You're welcome' at all cost. "How about after a famous brand name? How about Trojan? Or Swiffer? Wouldn't Nike be cool for a kids name?"

With a smile Chase flipped the shades of the window to the hall closed on his way out to House's dismay.

IIIII

"You're going soft, House. Admit it," Wilson probed him.

"Don't you have someone except your wife to sleep with?"

"I'm not berating you for doing it. I think it's a good step towards becoming humane."

"And you're reversing said step by annoying me. Now can you go do your job? I think I can hear a bald child down the hallway asking for pain meds."

"Lunch break," Wilson answered as they both waited for an elevator.

"Aren't you going to get them anything?" asked House.

"Of course I am," He said. "I wonder what they did with all of the things that we got them last time."

"I'm sure they'll multiply like rabbits. Soon enough there will be a girl in the family so they can use that stuff too," said House. "Are you going to get anything for the Mom?"

"Cameron? House, don't start-"

"Maybe some sensual chocolate and lotion?"

"Shutup!"

The next sentence came out at just the wrong time. "You still have the hots for Cameron don't you?"

The doors were opened on the elevator and Cameron was standing there blushing quite a deep shade of red. Wilson began to do the same before he gave her a quick "Hello" and went towards the doors of the building to make another quick exit.

"They say love can drive people to do crazy things," said House as Cameron joined him in the elevator. He didn't leave. "Maybe you can use that excuse and claim insanity when it's revealed you had sympathy sex with Wilson."

"I would never do that!" Cameron retorted, offended at the very idea.

"Of course you wouldn't. It was insanity!"

"You're unbelievable."

"I'm glad you think so. Does that mean I get some sympathy sex too?"

"I don't have _that_ much sympathy in me," She said walking out of the elevator with him. "But I should thank you properly for giving Chase that figurine."

"You know that I'm going to have to give you both hell for doing something decent for once. Which is why I asked him if I could name your child. He said no so I'm hoping you'll say yes," House said once again trying to avoid the 'You're welcome'. "I'm stuck on naming him Mary Jane. Is that bad?"

"Do you want him to get beat up at recess?"

"You don't know the reference, do you goody-goody?" House asked.

Cameron thought for a moment and said, "I hope you never have children for the sake of their self-esteem."

She stopped for a moment and leaned on House for support. Her knee's buckled and she said, "Oh God! Contraction!"

"Wheelchair!" House called out and grabbed one from a nurse who was about to sit an elderly gentlemen in. He pulled Cameron back slowly so she could sit down. "How's the pain?"

"Ow, ow, ow . . ."

"I take that as bad. Do you think you're going into labor?"

"No, no. False alarm. Just bad contractions," She said short of breath as the contraction released it's tormenting grip. Cameron stood up and let the nurse take the wheelchair back. "Sorry about that."

"What are you apologizing for? You're pregnant and he's old. He's lived long enough," House told her as they slowly walked away. He didn't leave her until they were both sure that it was the only contraction she was going to have.

IIIII

Cameron began to worry that maybe she would have the baby too soon again. Of course in the eighth month of pregnancy it was unlikely that the child would come out with something terribly wrong but she found that it was better to wait until nine months, right?

She couldn't force her body to do anything, and even if she was ecstatic at the idea of finally letting a child occupy the nursery, she wanted to remain pregnant until the ninth month. Then again wanting and having were two different things.

That night Cameron visited the nursery once again. It seemed dark and empty without the burst of life that it needed so much. Ashton would change that from the moment he arrived to his home. Then again, it was always a little girl would come, so she kept Isabella in mind.

After staring at Cecelia's pictures, silently asking for forgiveness once again, she placed the Superman figurine on the baby's yellow dresser. Cameron thought the more bright colors there were in the room the more the child's mind would expand to register all of the lively shades.

Cameron put the toy in different poses. It was odd how men, she began to think, compared themselves to the ability of a fictional hero. Not the super-powers but the might for fantastic rescues of saving loved one's; effortlessly finding ways through life's struggles and when the going got tough they fought back even harder.

Life wasn't like that. People don't always fight back. A lot would rather give up, and shake their heads, and blame the responsibility on somebody else. Cecelia's death was devastating but Cameron knew she and Chase did all they could. They weren't hero's. They were doctors trying to save lives through modern medicine. Some people thought that they should have the answers to everything.

Maybe that was where Chase's _'I must do better' _budded from, but it was most likely from the competition he had with his father who was a famous doctor. It had to be hard living in the shadow of Rowan Chase.

Even with the incident including Oscar Chase was unable to get over the fact that he wasn't able to rescue her. Cameron had come to terms with it . . . Chase just had a way of making everything his fault.

Mother being an out of control alcoholic? His fault because he couldn't fix her.

Lillian's horrid abuse? His fault since he couldn't fix his mother, which drove her to her horrible state of mind, and he would take his shame out on every obese person he met behind their backs.

Ronald digging up Cecelia's grave? She wasn't even sure how he interrupted that to be his fault.

Cameron couldn't help but grieve for what Chase had gone through all of those years.

"Allison? Is everything okay?"

Cameron looked up to meet with the stunning features of her boyfriend. She couldn't tell by looking at him that he was in emotional anguish - he had a concerned look for her. He was on his crutches still feeling awkward steering himself around the house.

"You look upset," He stated worriedly.

"I'm okay," she whispered but couldn't manage the words, "Are you?" They were stuck somewhere deep in her stomach.

"Right. You're nearly in tears over nothing, hm?" Chase reached out his warm hand touching her chilly face. He had meant for a touching moment but one of his crutches slipped out from underneath him, falling to the floor, and he had to use Cameron to hold himself up.

"You're so clumsy," said Cameron with a shaky voice and a dark chuckle. Cameron wanted to tell the truth about her worry for his emotional being, and knew some was her hormones getting to her, but she blurted out, "I'm upset because you won't cry for yourself, Chase. Even a couple days ago, or when you spoke about Lillian, you never cried. Why? I want to know why you'll cry for anyone else but you."

"I . . . Allison, it's the middle of the night. You're tired. Let's go to bed."

Cameron picked up his crutch letting himself balance himself again. She then snapped, "Don't blame this on exhaustion. I'm serious!"

"Fine. I'm going back to bed." He left rejected and didn't want to put up with the emotional baggage he had tried to store away where no one would ever think to bring it up again.

"Chase, I'm sorry." Cameron apologized following him into their bedroom. "I guess I don't understand your unwillingness to confront your past."

"Maybe I have a lot to do in the present?" He suggested before he set aside his crutches and crawled into bed underneath the warm blankets. "I told you about Lillian and my problems thinking you would lay off."

Cameron sat on the edge of the bed, facing away from him. She was at a loss for what to say next. "I'm one of those people that think confronting your past, and dealing with it, will help with the here and now. I wish you would talk about your mother. What was she like? What were her problems?"

"You need to stop, Allison," said Chase harshly. She was prowling into dark territory. "Don't try and fix what isn't broken."

Then the conversation she had with House came like a heavy load of bricks into her thoughts. Did she really have a knack for trying to mend someone's wounds? Kindness was second-nature to her so she could see it becoming annoying from time to time. Cameron was genuinely concerned but Chase didn't want her to intervene. Sometimes she knew that she should keep her mouth shut which had to happen more often so Chase wouldn't get to upset.

"You're right," Cameron said climbing underneath the sheets. Chase turned to stare her in the eyes. "Sorry. I shouldn't try to pry about your Mom."

"The past is in the past. There's no point in bringing it up now, right?"

Cameron was going to bring up Cecelia but the words became stuck in her throat and all that came out was a sigh. This was a time to keep quiet. Bringing up their dead daughter would only cause more controversy to stir. She nestled up to Chase who welcomed the affection. The warmness of their bodies together made them realize how lucky they were to have one another.

IIIII

At seven in the morning their doorbell rang. Groggy, and annoyed by the sudden awakening, Chase was first to get up and hobble towards the door. He figured he should walk on his leg more often since it had been a four days since he had been shot. Maybe it seemed to someone else that he was pushing it but he hated being on crutches. Now he understood how House felt about being pitied because of his cane. Cameron rose and walked down the hall to meet with Chase and a police officer.

"Allison, this is Officer Progrem," Chase introduced the older gentlemen who tipped his hat to her. "He's here about-"

"Cecelia?" Cameron eagerly interrupted.

"That's right, ma'am," Progrem said. "You two might want to take a seat first."

They sat down on the sofa while the officer stood. From the troublesome look in his eyes they realized immediately it was not good news.

"First I would like to give my condolences for your loss. I'm sorry that someone had the audacity to do such a thing. I don't know if either of you are religious but I'm sure that the little girl is at peace up in heaven right now.

As for this plane of reality there is not much more than we can do except stitch her back together."

"What?" Chase snapped. "How bad is it?"

"We believe it was an attempt to get rid of the bodies. He had mutilated all of five of the children and threw them in the garbage. He said he panicked."

"Oh my God," whispered Cameron, absolutely disgusted. "If I ever see him again . . . !"

"I know," said Chase rubbing his leg which hurt mildly. "I'm sorry."

"Me too," Cameron said. "What kind of human being would do such a thing?"

Progrem took a seat in a rocking chair kitty-corner to the couch. He said, "I know it won't ease your pain but his daughter was dying. She need a new liver and his insurance company was taking their time debating on whether they should pay for the surgery. He didn't have the money, and he nor his wife's family had the cash to pay for it, so in a desperate attempt he robbed five children's graves at random."

"I hate to say it but I feel sorry for him," Cameron spoke in a shaky voice. "I mean, I will never forgive him, but I can understand how someone can be driven to the edge and do crazy things to . . ." her voice drifted away unable to finish her sentence.

"Save your child," Chase muttered. "I know the feeling. If I had the slightest chance, no matter how tiny, I could have given a limb to keep Cecelia alive. I just can't imagine though making someone else suffer to save my child's life. I don't think I could do that."

"Neither could I," agreed Progrem. "I have two boys myself. Twins. They're the center of my life. I can't imagine going through what you two have."

"Atleast we have another chance," Cameron rubbed her stomach.

"Boy or girl?" asked Progrem.

"Boy," Chase answered proudly.

"Have fun with that. Boy's can be hellions," he chuckled. "I'm glad to see though that you two haven't been torn apart by the tragedy of loosing a child. Not many people can manage that."

The couple put on a smile, wrapping their arms around eachother.

Then Cameron asked the difficult question. "Will she be recognizable?"

"The good news is she was not maimed beyond recognition. I don't want to go into details about her injuries, unless you want to know." When they looked at eachother, silently questioning eachother, they shook their heads in unison. "Alright. She and the other children are going to be buried again tomorrow at five AM. I hope you both will be there."

"We'll be there of course. I just don't know if I can take seeing her sewn together like . . . like some rag doll!" Chase snapped in frustration.

Progrem laid his worry to rest. "When you arrive she will already be in her coffin. Parents who do want to see their child will be allowed to."

Cameron nodded. "What's going to happen to Ronald?" She asked curiously. She could feel Chase's hand squeeze her's roughly at the mention of the name.

"He's fighting it, trying to get a not guilty by reason of temporary insanity, something surely his lawyer brought up in a spur of the moment. But don't worry we have too much evidence, and too many eye witness's, so there is no way he is going to make it out of that courtroom without a good sentencing."

"Sicko," hissed Chase under his breath.

Cameron squeezed his hand. "Atleast she's being returned to her resting place."

"Anything else?" Chase asked the officer.

Progrem shook his head. He stood up, shook both of their hands saying, "I wish you both luck with the newborn. Take good care of that leg, sport. God Bless."

After the officer left they both sat, not sure how to re-act. Happy? Sad? Angry? Vengeful?

Maybe the best reaction would be paying respects the next day and move on with their lives.

IIIII

**A/N: I know this one is a tad short but the PROPOSAL in the next chapter should incite you to come back, eh?**


End file.
